It’s 4:19, You Gotta Minute? (April 30th)

• Bob Uecker don’t Tweet – unless it somehow involves furries, that is. [Big League Stew]

• Why in the holy hell do the Capitals have a male cheerleader? This aggression against our rights as misogynists will not stand. [SPORTSbyBROOKS]

• Weight-loss guru Jenny Craig has a horse that is racing in the Kentucky Derby named Chocolate Candy. Darren Rovell would like suggestions for a different name. I would suggest Kirstie Alley, but horses and pigs are two different animals entirely. [Sports Biz with Darren Rovell]

• Joel Zumaya hates the Yankees – maybe it’s Guitar Hero-related. [MLB Fanhouse]

•  Flyers goalie Marty Brion, pictured below, doesn’t care much for Sidney Crosby, or so it would appear. [Philly Pfaithful, via Puck Daddy]