WE MUST PROTECT THIS HOUSE…FROM MALE PATTERN BALDNESS?
It will be announced on Wednesday at a Camden Yards news conference that Ripken Baseball Inc. and Under Armour are joining forces to create the ultimate corporate machine – the kind of dedicated force which will come to work for its clients day-in, day-out, despite decreasing production and well-being of the companies.
While details of Wednesday’s announcement were not disclosed, sources familiar with the new partnership said Under Armour will have a substantial presence at Ripken’s baseball properties, which include three minor league franchises, in Aberdeen, Augusta, Ga., and Port Charlotte, Fla., and perhaps more importantly, at two youth training facilities in Aberdeen and Myrtle Beach, S.C. The Under Armour brand is particularly appealing to the youth market, the source said.
Sources say that Ripken, who worked with Nike during his playing days, is excited about the opportunity to again work with such a well-respected athletic apparel company. Unfortunately for Ripken, news has not reached him that Kevin Costner has been in messing around with Under Armour for months now behind Cal’s back.
Fuckin’ Kevin Costner, man. I’ve always thought he was a tool – and that was before he formed Modern West*. Fuck that guy.
* Warning: do not listen to anything on this site if there are scissors, letter openers or any other object that can be shoved into ears repeatedly
Ripken Baseball, Under Armour to form partnership [The Baltimore Sun]
The Cost(ner) of Love [Snopes]