Texans fan drinks own urine to appease ‘Football Gods’ after win over Chargers (vid)
If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard about an unhinged NFL fan actually drinking his own urine in order to make good on a promise he made to the “Football Gods” on what he would do if his favorite football team staged a comeback in the second half of a game to win? Well, I’d have a nickel, I guess.
Despite the fact that I won’t pad my pockets with this story, a Houston Texans fan posted a video of himself drinking his own urine because, hey, if you’re going to do something as ludicrous as drink your own bodily fluid waste because you said you would, why not put it on the Internet for everyone to see?
You see, here’s what happened: This guy, obviously frustrated by the fact that the Texans were trailing the San Diego Chargers by a score of 21-7 at halftime on Monday night. So he did the sensible thing: He promised the all-powerful “Football Gods” that he would consume his own pee if the team came back and won the game.
And wouldn’t you know it? The Texans did come back and win the game, outscoring the Chargers 24-7 to win a 31-28 squeaker. All hail the Football Gods!
In his own words, via Deadspin:
“To all the Texans fans, however many of you there may be: When you say you’ve done everything for your team, think about this and consider that there MAY be something else you can do. Don’t be a bitch. Man up.”
That’s right, don’t be a bitch. Man up. Drink your own piss. It all adds up when you think about it. And he’s right, there may be something else you can do.
Say you promised to eat your own poop if your team recovers an onside kick and kicks a game-winning field goal as time expires. Daggummit, you better eat that poop. And smile while you’re doing it. You did promise the Omnipotent and Omniscient Football Gods after all.
Myself? I’d simply promise something less nasty. Like, “Football gods, if my team comes back and wins this game, I’ll drink a nice cold beer.” Football gods ain’t care about what the promise is, only that a person follows through on it. So I’ve heard.