Archive for December, 2011
Sawicki Motors, a car dealership in the town of Rochelle in north central Illinois has come up with a brilliant marketing coup that has virtually no chance of costing them a dime: if the Chicago Bears hold the Green Bay Packers scoreless in the teams’ upcoming game on Christmas, the dealership will give out free cars.
Best. Promotion. Ever.
Why is it the best promotion ever? Because the likelihood of the Packers’ vaunted, high-scoring offense getting shut out by an opponent is about as slim as, um, the Packers’ suspect defense shutting a team out. As in, there is absolutely no chance it is going to happen, at least this season.
Nevertheless, Sawicki Motors general manager Ron Matula (seen above) a native Chicagoan, insists he would love to see it happen, saying, “It’d be the best Christmas present that I ever handed out. I’m hoping that Green Bay scores zero points.”
Yeah, right. There is nothing a car dealership would like to see more than their inventory completely wiped out with no money coming in. Granted, the Chicago Tribune report makes no mention of any rules, stipulations, caveats, or fine print regarding the free car giveaway, much less exactly how many cars the dealership will part with if the unimaginable and miraculous somehow occurred. Still, you have to hand it to the guy. Without this whacky promotion that he dreamed up, would you have heard of Sawicki Motors? Exactly.
Oh, how very witty, Colton Orr. How very witty, indeed.
On Tuesday, the Toronto Maple Leafs held the inaugural “Leafs Nation Fan Night,” an event where 13,000 die-hard fans showed up at Air Canada Centre to enjoy all-things Maple Leafs. Among the festivities was a four-on-four scrimmage, a light workout and at the end of the event, 24 Maple Leafs players presented their jerseys to previously selected fans.
But the highlight of the night for the fans was likely the shootout, especially Maple Leafs right winger Colton Orr’s antics after he scored on netminder James Reimer and busted out a little bit of Tebowing for the fans in attendance.
At least one of Orr’s teammates got a kick out of the homage to the Denver Broncos quarterback (via the Toronto Star):
“I’m a Tebow fan too and I thought about doing it,” said centre Tyler Bozak, who attended the University of Denver, in the home city of Tebow’s Broncos. “(Orr) knew he was going to score — he’s a breakaway guy, he’s a breakaway specialist.”
While certainly clever on Orr’s part and given the Tebowing occurred during an exhibition for the fans and not during an actual game is a welcome relief, but how much longer are we going to have to tolerate Tebowing? Hasn’t it jumped the shark at this point? Or better put, shouldn’t it have jumped the shark by now? Don’t most crazes and fads like Tebowing usually have a shelf life of a month tops before it they are deemed played out and passé? Why won’t this happen to Tebowing? Oh yeah, that’s right: because it is related to Tim Tebow Mania, something you cannot control, you can only hope to contain it, and even that seems like an impossible task.
Still, I think Toronto GM Brian Burke should suspend Orr for his on-ice antics — like those high school kids who got suspended in New York — even if it was during an exhibition and done in a celebratory and whimsical spirit. Yeah, that’s right: Bah, humbug to all the blasted Tebowing. Call me a cranky cur if you will, but I know I’m not the only one to have that sentiment.
The New York Post‘s Page 6 dropped a gossipy bomb for the ages early Wednesday morning when they reported that blonde bombshell (and apparent avid Jets fan) Kate Upton might be dating New York Jets bomb-thrower (that’s a whole lotta bomb references there, for some reason) Mark Sanchez. Commence intense pangs of bitter jealousy now.
Apparently, according to Page 6′s gossip hounds, Sanchez frequently has been seen around Upton’s Flatiron apartment building as of late, often showing up in a chauffeur-driven Navigator. Sanchez reportedly also was spotted in the lobby of the luscious model’s lobby carrying gifts after he attended a charity event.
Says NYP’s sources:
“They never come in together. He’s always five steps after her,” our source told us, adding that Sanchez often hides under a woolly hat. Sexy Upton has also attended some Jets games as her sister, Christie Upton, is a manager of client relations for the team and works closely with Sanchez.
Another source insisted that Upton and Sanchez are “just friends.”
What to believe, right? The chance that these two dating certainly resides within the realm of possibility. And simply due to the aforementioned chance that these two NYC megastars might be linked is enough to keep the New York gossip rags in a state of perpetual curiosity for some time, at least until an admitted confirmation or adamant denial is issued from one of the two stars’ respective camps. Unfortunately (and not surprisingly), Upton’s people refused to comment on her personal life and Sanchez’s representative’s did not respond to Page 6′s inquiries.
This isn’t the first time Kate Upton’s name has been linked to a high-profile New York athlete. Just recently, Upton engaged in a back-and-forth with Rangers pest Sean Avery on Twitter, although there were no romantic aspects to that amusing story, so it wasn’t quite as an intriguing story as this one. But as far as the possible Sanchez-Upton pairing is concerned, for now, I suppose we’ll just have to let the rumors stew and wait and see what kind of conjecture, whispers and gossip emerges next. Until then, look: another attractive photo of Kate Upton to look upon! Everybody wins!
Finally, the folks at NMA World Edition have set their sights on the Kobe Bryant divorce saga. To be frank, I’m stunned it took them this long.
Via NMA.tv:
Los Angeles Lakers star Kobe Bryant is mired in a bitter divorce from his wife of 10 years, Vanessa Bryant. She cites irreconcilable differences in papers filed with the Superior Court of California in Orange County on Friday, however TMZ has reported Kobe’s serial cheating is the real reason for the split.
Vanessa allegedly got wind of the infidelities through a network of NBA wives who repeated gossip told to them by Kobe’s teammates. The specifics are still unclear, but sources claim the five-time NBA champion had numerous mistresses, and that it wasn’t until his most recent affair when Vanessa finally decided to end their marriage.
The couple never signed a prenuptial agreement, which means Vanessa could seek half of Kobe’s estimated $150 million worth. She has already laid claim to their palatial mansion in Newport Coast, another TMZ report alleges. There is also speculation she will get to keep a $4 million ring Kobe gave to her in 2003 while he was being investigated for the rape of a 19-year-old woman in Colorado. The case was later dropped, but a civil suit was settled in 2005.
The press has not been all good for Vanessa, however. Her former stepfather has alleged she is a gold digger who had been planning to divorce Kobe after their 10-year anniversary. Divorcing spouses in California may seek enough money to live at the same level they enjoyed while they were married.
I dunno, man, this report was alright — the part where Kobe is fraternizing with the Lakers cheerleaders was pretty amusing – but I think we can all agree that it needs more psychotic imagery in line with some of their previous reports, like when Ndamukong Suh dismembered a Packers player and the one where Tim Tebow stabbed a dolphin. Those were solid efforts. Overall, I give the Taiwanese Animation Treatment of Kobe’s divorce a solid C+, but there’s not reason to go Kobe-in-Colorado and get anal about it.
Not that some quasi-trick shot exhibition during a scrimmage is any sign of anything, seeing brand new T-Wolves players Ricky Rubio and Derrick Williams team up for a nifty little play is a pleasant sight to see, as hope is always a powerful and most welcome elixir.
With that in mind, allow me this: as a long-suffering Minnesota Timberwolves fan, I approve of this video. That is all.
[H/T The Basketball Jones]
Alonzo George, a quadriplegic former Brooklyn high-school basketball player, is rightfully upset with the New York Knicks. After learning from a friend who has been treating him to Knicks games that the team has raised the price of courtside seats dedicated to access for the disabled a whopping — and some might argue reprehensible — 900%. The seats which were going for $300 a pop last season will now cost an unbelievable $2,850. Ouch.
Said George, who was high school basketball standout before he was tragically paralyzed from the neck down in a car accident in 2007, regarding the price hike (via the New York Post):
“I was really shocked. I’m wondering how they did that, especially with people in a wheelchair.
“I’m not sure I want to go to the games at those prices.”
The opportunity for George to attend Knicks games was being provided by Ed Rose, vice chairman at the Maxim Group investment bank, a company where George had been interning. He had been purchasing two tickets for he and George in the wheelchair-accessible area in Madison Square Garden for $600. Now those same tickets would cost him $5,700.
Garden spokesman Barry Watkins said the $300 spots were eliminated as part of the arena’s ongoing $850 million renovation. He said the new floor spots for the disabled are closer to the action than the old ones.
The average increase for seats in the Garden this year was about 50 percent, including accommodations for the disabled at 14 other locations in the arena. The price hikes, he said, were due to renovation costs.
Obviously, the company that runs and operates Madison Square Garden — as a private entity running a business as they see fit — have each and every right to charge whatever they please for seats, so long as there are people out there willing to pay for them, but it seems to me that the considerable increase in profits they will make off the absurdly substantial increase in prices for seats which accommodate disabled fans who would like to sit courtside pales in comparison to the public relations hit they Knicks and Madison Square Garden are sure to receive as a consequence of this story. Sometimes, it’s just not worth it.
(screengrab via Disney.com)
An upcoming film from Pixar Animation Studios entitled Brave is being met with opposition by the Atlanta Braves organization as the team claims the title of the film qualifies as trademark infringement. Wait. What?
The movie, set to be released in the summer of 2012 revolves around the exploits of Princess Merida and in no way has anything to do with baseball, let alone the Atlanta Braves. Yep. I’ll chalk this one up to Bad Idea Legal Battles.
Originally called The Bow and the Bear, a re-titling of the movie was set in motion last March when Disney submitted trademark applications for the title of Brave, apparently much to the chagrin of the Atlanta Braves, who filed a series of objections to many of the trademark applications, since the organization has apparently little else to do.
From a Stitch Kingdom report (via Big League Stew):
Although trademarks are specific to their singular and plural forms and the Braves do not possess any trademarks for the word BRAVE (only BRAVES), the organization believes that damages will occur as a result of Disney’s trademarks being approved as they have used the singular form before on merchandise and insist it is common for fans, media, et al to use the singular form when referring to a single player, whereas the pluralized form refers to the entire team.
The team and Disney are now engaging in private negotiations to settle the issue, which I suppose is nice of Disney, because if you ask me, this has to be one of the dumbest things I have ever read. The Atlanta Braves do realize that they didn’t invent the word “brave,” right? That the word has other meanings than that of the name of their baseball team? I could see a team like the Red Sox opposing a movie title with their team’s name in it, but Brave is a completely different situation.
If the Braves somehow succeeded in their trademark challenge — which, although not an expert on trademark law, I suspect they will most definitely not prevail — I bet other MLB teams will be kicking themselves for not thinking of this earlier, as teams like the Pirates, Angels and Rangers have had their team name co-opted on many occasions. But perhaps most importantly, to think that the movie Twins might never had been made. What an ugly world that would have been.
Pardon the Interruption? More like Pardon the High Five Corruption, amirite? Okay, that was weak, but moving on, during Monday’s broadcast of ESPN’s Pardon the Interruption, co-hosts Tony Kornheiser and Michael Wilbon, despite the fact that they have been working together on the program since 2001 and before that were colleagues at The Washington Post for many years, failed miserably in their attempt to execute what Jerry Seinfeld once referred to as the “lowest form of male primate ritual.” Trouble ensued with Tony went in for a high five but Wilbon opted to go with a fist bump.
Whoever manages PTI’s Twitter account — I have always suspected it’s Tony Reali — described the unfortunate — albeit relatively benign yet amusing — mishap as follows:
AWKWARD adj. 1. That moment when one person goes for the high-five, and the other goes for the fist-bump.
Awkward, indeed. I only wish the guys would have Jaws on to break down film of the high five fail and then have Peter King on so he could mention who he recently spoke on his cell phone regarding the gaffe. That would be engrossing television.
And now, an update on how the better half live, in particular how one superstar NFL quarterback and his supermodel wife live: the final touches are presently being completed on Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen’s 22,000-square-foot mansion in the Brentwood neighborhood of Los Angeles, and given the preliminary details provided by Boston.com (via Shutdown Corner), regarding the basics of the mega-house, it certainly sounds like the two and their brood will be living in the lap of luxury:
The couple paid $11 million for the 3.75-acre property, and then many millions more to build the house. When done, it’s expected to have eight bedrooms, a covered bridge, six-car garage, elaborate gardens, and a lagoon-shaped swimming pool…
Wow. Sounds prettay prettay prettay fantastic. I’m not sure if Brady and Bundchen intend to name their new modest living quarters, but if they are and haven’t settled on one yet, might I suggest “Ostentatious Manor”? It has a nice ring to it and is remarkably accurate. But then again, as they say, to the victor go the spoils. I only wonder if they plan to rent out the basement, because if so, I could do some mighty fine blogging from down there.
Otherwise, the fact that the Sheffield Steelers, an English hockey team playing in something called the Elite Ice Hockey League, meticulously — okay maybe not meticulously but they do a pretty darn good job of it — recreated the video for the Nickelback’s “song” “Rockstar” is a hoot.
If actually listening to Nickeback “music” is simply too objectionable of an option, I suppose you could always just mute the music and play some of the soothing sounds of Boz Scaggs or something. Yeah, Boz Scaggs music: nothing wrong with that. I bet even the poseurs from Nickelback would be hard-pressed to argue with that certifiable fact.
[H/T Puck Daddy]
TMZ, as they are wont to do, were out stalking the streets Monday evening when, by some stroke of luck — not tipped off by someone’s publicist regarding where said person was going to be at a certain time (I mean, who would do such a thing?) — when they somehow crossed paths with former Playboy Playmate Jessica Burciaga. What makes TMZ’s running into Burciaga so interesting is that she has been fingered by several Hollywood gossip sites as a potential mistress of Kobe Bryant’s and whose alleged relationship with the Lakers star allegedly might have been the alleged (I allegedly enjoy sprinkling my stories with variations of the word “allege”) last straw for why Vanessa Bryant filed for divorce.
Utterly fascinating stuff. Sure, it sheds no light whatsoever on anything about anything relating to Bryant’s divorce, but hey, Miss Burciaga looked great, so there’s that. Also, I got to pretend that I am some kind of intrepid Hollywood gossip reporter, which is always a kick.
Photos documenting Dennis Rodman’s “unique” choice to dramatically paint up his face — I suppose any time a grown man slaps some makeup on and resembles some kind of demented clown prior to playing in an exhibition basketball game is always a unique choice — have made the rounds all around the interwebs the past day or so but I still felt it was necessary to properly document it here at the Sportress. Why? Because it’s frightening, funny and, um, shows that Dennis Rodman, despite his getting older, still behaves like Dennis Rodman. Which is kind of cool. Further, it is probably the first time a member of a team — not a fan — actually painted their face to support the team. Unless we’re talking about intramural basketball leagues at the many fine clown colleges we have in America. I’m sure this kind of thing happens all the time.
[via]
Since NBA preseason games are even more meaningless than early regular season NBA games, we need not go into the details relating to the outcome of the Los Angeles Clippers-Los Angeles Lakers tilt on Monday evening at Staples Center, because really, who gives a crap, right?
One aspect of what transpired during the game does require addressing, however, and that is the ticky-tack technical foul called on Blake Griffin after he was fed the rock by Chauncey Billups for a breakaway dunk. Griffin didn’t even throw it down with the same ferocity as he has demonstrated time and time again during his short career but the referees took issue with him hanging on the rim afterward. The problem was that Griffin really didn’t hang onto the rim that long, maybe a second or two and he wasn’t even that demonstrative about it, either.
All I’m saying is if referees are going to call technical fouls as freely and loosely as they did on Monday night, it’s going to be a long, lockout-shortened season.
[H/T SportsGrid]
Sweet sassy molassey. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night. Talk about holiday spirit! Miss Arianny Celeste won’t be getting any coal in her stocking this year! I don’t mean to get out of line here, but “Pa rum pum pum pum!” Additional weak Christmas reference.
Alright, alright, let us not allow my words to further sully up the lovely Arianny Celeste’s holiday-themed photo uploads from this week. Instead, let us enjoy the good tidings she brings, which follow.
What the fungus? That’s the official poster of Super Bowl XLVI? Interesting, in a “What were they thinking?” kind of way.
Oh, I kid, I kid. It’s not really that bad. But it is all glittery and confetti-like and a bit off-putting at first and I don’t get orange streaks running vertically up the side of the Lombardi Trophy, but then again, I’m not a member of the snobby art critic community, who I am sure love it.
Created by Indiana artist Walter Knabe — whose last name Chris Chase of Shutdown Corner points out sounds a lot like imaginary Indiana resident Leslie Knope, among other astute and amusing observations, both pro and con — who said his motivation for the poster was that he “wanted it to be pretty democratic so that everybody would get it, and I wanted it to be celebratory.”
Well, it is certainly celebratory. I’ll give him that. All kidding aside, well done, Mr. Knabe. That is one humdinger of a Super Bowl poster.
