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Tebowmania Will Be Running Wild During SportsCenter Devoted Entirely To Tim Tebow

TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW……TEBOW!!

If you were to put the above string of Tebows into audio form — speaking of “string of Tebows,” why can’t I purchase a string of lighted Tebows Tebowing so I can decorate my Christmas tree is Tebowtastic glory? — and place them in a constant loop but slightly alter the track so it sounds like the way grown-ups on Charlie Brown cartoons would sound if they repeatedly said “Tebow,” that would be about the equal in irritability you will hear if you tune into the hour-long 2:00 ET edition of SportsCenter on Wednesday. You see, the entire hour will be devoted to none other than Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow. You’ve heard of him, right?

Instead of metaphorically beating my head against the wall by breaking the abject stupidity of it all, instead allow me to bring you the relevant portions of the announcement regarding “A Very Special Episode of SportsCenter” (if ESPN could somehow mix in some Jerry Sandusky coverage during the broadcast it would be just like that very special episode of Diff’rent Strokes with the pervert bicycle shop owner):

ESPN’s “SportsCenter” is planning to dedicate an entire hour-long program to the Tim Tebow phenomenon. Barring major breaking news, the show from 2-3 p.m. ET Wednesday will be dedicated to the young Denver Broncos quarterback. Tebow has brought his team into the playoff mix by winning six of seven starts this season and five games in a row. 

Here are some of segments that are planned for the show:

  • Highlights of Tebow’ comebacks.
  • Josina Anderson reports live from the Broncos facility.
  • Jerry Rice will break down Tebow’s development as a passer.
  • Steve Young will discuss Tebow’s future and how the Broncos should handle him.
  • An Ed Werder feature: “Winning the Tebow Way.”
  • The debate over Tebow with Skip Bayless.
  • The top-10 Tebow moments, which will include his Florida days.
  • An examination of Tebow’s impact on fantasy football.

Sounds grand. I, for one, am especially looking forward to the Ed Werder feature, “Winning the Tebow Way.” Hopefully, I will pick up some valuable insights on how to apply Tebow’s principles to my own life.

I have but one question: bearing in mind how almost every SportsCenter broadcast has gone since the so-called “Tim Tebow Phenomenon” was unleashed upon the world, how much different will this broadcast be from any of the other ones? No, really: how much different?

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