Archive for October, 2011
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• Talk about harshing some guy’s munchies mellow, am I right? A Papa John’s delivery man in Aurora, Colorado alerted the police after delivering a pie to a house where he suspected marijuana-smoking was taking place due to his concerns about the welfare of a 9-year-old boy in the residence. Turns out the suspected pot smoker, Frederick Smith, has a prescription for medicinal marijuana due to pain related to a bike accident (??), so police did not file any charges. Whether or not you agree or disagree with the pizza delivery guy’s actions as a “concerned citizen,” one nevertheless has to question his motives: does he not realize that without weed smokers are his employer’s target market? [msnbc]
• German couple has sex in the stands during a soccer match, no one cares. [Off the Bench]
• Ha. A Brewers fan calls 911 after misplacing his remote. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Jim Leyland grooved to Santana on the way to the ballpark last night. [Big League Stew]
• Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari are back together, baby! [Busted Coverage]
• Phoenix Coyotes goaltender Jason LaBarbera’s mask honors Pat Tillman. [Puck Daddy]
• We have a new meme to watch: Excited Soccer Kid is Excited. [With Leather]
• Hank Williams, Jr.’s next project. [Rumors & Rants]
• Brett Favre cannot believe it took Aaron Rodgers so long to win a Super Bowl. [Shutdown Corner]
• These NFL QB puppets are beyond terrifying. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• Ten very informative tailgating tips. [Sports Pickle]
• F an starts brawl at a…sand soccer match? What the? [Outside the Boxscore]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: Sports Fan Digs Deep, Finds Something To Complain About
Ha. There is truly nothing worse than having a profoundly embarrassing moment captured on video. To make matters much, much worse, having it subsequently broadcast on national television for all the world to see is not a good thing either. Compound that by the fact it will receive a litany of views on the interwebs in this new modern age, hoo boy. And now, cameraman Tim Burke knows this sad reality of an “Epic Fail Caught On Tape” all too well.
While attempting to get a close-up view of Texas Rangers third baseman Adrian Beltre trotting home after rounding third after a home run in the top of the 2nd inning during Game 4 of Texas’ division series against the Tampa Bay Rays, Burke’s feet got all tangled up, causing him to come crashing down in a flailing heap of humanity and embarrassment over a period of several stumbling steps. He might have broken his camera, too. Double ouch.
Don’t worry, though, Tim Burke: infamy on the internet only feels like it lasts forever.
[H/T Sports Grid]
The statistics compiled by the New York Daily News are compelling, but we really going to attribute the fact that Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter struggled after their high profile breakups with Cameron Diaz and Minka Kelly, respectively, and have continued to struggle in the postseason, solely on the fact that they are newly single?
According to the stats provided, A-Rod’s batting average was .150 after his split with Diaz in mid-September and he has been abysmal in the playoff series against the Detroit Tigers, going an abysmal 0-10 heading into Tuesday evening’s must-win game for the Yankees. Prior to the breakup, Rodriguez was batting .284.
Jeter, whose relationship with Kelly ended in late August, went on a bit of a slide but not one as severe as the one suffered by A-Rod (.264 since the split, .299 before it). On the other hand, Jeter is performing decently in the postseason — although not the production one has come to expect from Jeter in October — going 4-15 with four runs scored.
Radical, dude. The legendary skater attached the following message to his photo upload:
Just skated NYSE trading floor; nobody protested
Cool cool. But did this stunt really have something to do with that Occupy Wall Street brouhaha? Because if it did, that would be so un-gnarly. Brah. Or would it make it bodaciously gnarly? Crap, with all the hullabaloo, my Sliding Scale of Gnarliness is all messed up now and that, my friends, is so not gnarly.
[via @tonyhawk]
Ha. That’s good stuff right there. I elected to highlight Tommy Chong above, but Cheech Marin also makes an appearance, not to mention Albert Einstein, the cue-balled look of Mr. Clean, Frank Zappa, Abe Lincoln, Mr. T, a member of ZZ Top and William Shakespeare are also accounted for. It’s all a rather silly exercise, but given that Tiger hasn’t given much for the golfing media community to write about relating to his play on the course, I suppose having a little fun with the facial hair look Tiger has been toying with over the past year or so is acceptable and worthy of a little good-natured lampooning.
The video, entitled, “The Many Faces Of Tiger Woods…Real And Imagined” follows. Enjoy.
Hey Tigers fans, would you like to show up at Comerica Park looking exactly like Jim Leyland without the 50 years of smoking two packs a day? How about Jhonny Peralta without consuming 8,000 calories a day? Well, if you are one of those folks who also happen to have a color printer at your disposal, you — yes, you — can take advantage of the Detroit Free Press‘ do-it-yourself “Be Your Favorite Tiger” masks.
Granted, they masks are PDF files so you’ll need to update your Adobe Reader software (again), but imagine the looks of admiration and envy you’ll be on the receiving end of when you take your seat to cheer on your beloved Detroit Tigers. Either that or you will awake in the back of an ambulance after seriously injuring yourself because you didn’t cut big enough eye holes and ended up tumbling down the steps, much to everyone’s delight who wasn’t silly enough to take up the hometown newspaper’s ridiculous offer. Although at the same time, I bet you wouldn’t catch any gruff from any wisenheimers while sporting the Jim Leyland mask. It presents quite the intimidating presence, even in cheesy paper mask form.
Which brings me to my final point in this horrible example of Gotta Support the Team Fail: on the page of the Free Press’ website where the download is available, it clearly states that all one has to do is “follow the directions” located on your mask printout. Sorry, but if a person requires directions in order to successfully cut out and assemble one’s “Be Your Favorite Tiger” mask, methinks said woodhead shouldn’t be allowed to use scissors. Well, maybe those kid-friendly ones, but definitely not the grown-up variety.
[H/T Big League Stew]
Man, that Drew Pearson is one opinionated individual. Just last month he was ripping Cowboys WR Dez Bryant, now he’s moved on to ripping people for not ripping Tony Romo. The former Dallas Cowboys great was appearing on KESN-FM’s Ben & Skin Show when he blasted Nowitzki for the Mavericks leader issuing a sympathetic tweet directed to the heavily-scrutinized Cowboys quarterback and fellow Dallas star athlete. If it wasn’t enough to overreact by taking Nowitzki to task over a harmless tweet, get a look at how he denigrated the game of basketball during his mini-rant (via Game On!):
Hey Dirk, this is football, this ain’t basketball. This is a real game where a lot of emotions play a lot more heavily into what you’re doing out there as a professional. I respect Dirk, there’s no question, and I know where he’s coming from because he has sustained the criticism and now the criticism has stopped because they won an NBA championship. So what he should be telling Tony is if you want to stop the criticism, quit making those kinds of mistakes and lead your team to a championship.
Interesting. Football is a “real game” that involves a player’s emotions playing into what’s going on in between the lines a lot more heavily. While most of what Pearson says has some validity, I am pretty sure most would agree that emotions play just a big of role in a player’s performance on the court as it does on the gridiron. If that wasn’t the case, Darko Milicic would be a perennial All-Star.
Not everyone is impressed that Nowitzki has Romo’s back [Game On!]
You think it would be easy for a kid to sit back and enjoy his favorite MLB team, the Tampa Bay Rays, take on the Texas Rangers from the comfort of a nice, plush recliner located along the third base line at Tropicana Field last night. But no, his dad might have splurged a bit too much on cotton candy and Cracker Jax, because this particular Rays fan just couldn’t stay seated while cheering on the home team. And do you know what? It might have spared him a trip to the emergency room.
In the top of the 7th inning and the Rangers at the plate, catcher Mike Napoli absolutely scalded a foul ball down the line on a rope…smashing directly into the recliner where the boy presumably was just sitting a mere moments earlier. A close call to be sure. The kid should be thanking his lucky stars he’s hyperactive and can’t sit down.
Sure, the kid got the ball, but the Rays lost by a score of 4-3 to go down to Texas two games to one. I wonder if this kid would rather been drilled with the ball and had the Rays win. Granted, it might have stung for a bit, but going up 2-1 in a division series lasts a lifetime. Okay, maybe not a lifetime — more like until the next game — but at least he would have had something to show his classmates to prove was in the crowd and a small part of the action. Like a ginormous knot and a ghastly bruise. Little boys love that stuff.
[H/T Sports Grid]
You know, I never really understood how to do those Yakov Smirnoff “In Soviet Russia, (fill in the blank) you!”, which is clearly evidenced by the above headline fail. What I do understand, however, is scoring a goal of the kick-off of a match is pretty darn fast and about the quickest a goal can be scored in the grand game of soccer.
From vlogger 101greatgoalsFan (via The Guardian):
Goal in the execution of MMichail Osinov in the match between Mitos (Novocherkassk) – Olympia (Gelendzhik), the second league, region “South”
Goal in the execution of MMichail Osinov? He was killed for scoring the goal? Is Vladimir Putin already back reaching into his old bag of tricks over there?
Now that’s some savvy political commentary for you guys. Hard-hitting soccer analysis interspersed with details revealing an astute grasp of the state of global politics: you won’t find stuff like that on every sports blog out there. Which I suppose is a good thing in hindsight.
See, it’s funny because CC Sabathia has a rather sizable gut and even though it was gut check time in a figurative sense , the time for Sabathia to literally check his gut has long since passed. Good stuff.
Also: the Yankees lost to the Tigers to go down 2 games to 1 in the series. That too is good stuff.
[H/T Hardball Talk]
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• After a local teenage kid killed his Call of Duty character during an online session of gaming, Mark Bradford, of Plymouth, England, a father of three, knowing where the kid lived, went over to his house and grabbed him by the neck with both hands, according to the kid’s mother. [msnbc]
• Just in case you were wondering why you weren’t as annoyed at the intro of Monday Night Football last night it was because Hank Williams, Jr.’s little song was yanked after he compared Obama to Hitler. [Awful Announcing]
• David Beckham got into an opposing coach’s face after a Galaxy win. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Reggie Bush was spotted partying in Los Angeles Sunday night after the Dolphins lost to the Chargers. [Busted Coverage]
• Vikings WR Bernard Berrian got into a Twitter fight with an amputee war veteran. Bravo. [Shutdown Corner]
• A hockey-themed Bar Mitvah? [Puck Daddy]
• Angela Rypien, Mark’s daughter, got a little punchy in her Lingerie Football League debut. [Off the Bench]
• Madonna is rumored to be the Super Bowl halftime “entertainment” this season, so here’s a nightmare fuel photo of her. Yeesh. [With Leather]
• Andy Roddick walked out of a press conference after a media member asked him a moronic question about retiring. [Sharapova's Thigh]
• Michael Beasley cannot believe how high his rating is in NBA 2K12. Probably because he’s high. [Ball Don't Lie]
• Peter King: still mourning the Red Sox. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• Don’t worry, Tony Romo, Dirk Nowitzki’s got your back. [That NBA Lottery Pick]
• A Samoan rugby player has been suspended due to Twitter. [Rumors & Rants]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: Man Strains To Find Personalities In Pet Fish
Including Steve Bartman. But it’s not like will be showing up anyway. That guy is harder to find than a Mafia snitch in the witness relocation program.
Be that as it may, the Dayton Gems, members of the Central Hockey League and based in, conveniently, Dayton, Ohio, will be holding a “Salute to Steve Bartman Night” on Oct. 14 at the whimsically-named Cassano’s Italian Ice at Hara Arena.
The details, from Our Sports Central (via Off the Bench):
In honor of Bartman, and his infamous foul ball grab which arguably set off the biggest professional sports controversy in the past decade, the Dayton Gems will salute him and his rather unfortunate distinction by offering Bartman a free ticket to the game, to be left for him at the Hara box office, to celebrate the eighth anniversary of his notoriety.
In addition, any fans dressed as Steve Bartman, complete with Cubs hat, green turtleneck and wearing headphones, will also receive one free admission to the game. Gems team president Joe Greene spearheaded the idea, noting “while our staff will be dressed like Steve, and there will be baseball and Bartman themed contests and promotions going on throughout the night, we would like to remind our fans to refrain from reaching over the glass for stray pucks.” The team will also offer prizes and special recognition for the best dressed “Bartman” lookalikes in attendance.
You know, it hasn’t been the best couple of weeks for old Bartman. First, he was the subject of that documentary, Catching Hell, which presumably brought back all the bad memories, for Cubs fans — and probably Bartman as well — now this: a night saluting the lowest point of a person’s life in a hockey arena whose playing surface is named after some company’s Italian Ice. In Dayton, Ohio. Everything’s coming up Bartman!
I guess you could say that the entire event will be quite the gem. Get it?
Dayton Gems Announce “Salute To Steve Bartman Night” [Our Sports Central (via Off the Bench)]
Now that, my friends, is commitment to a bit. Well done, Giant Yellow Afro-Wearing San Diego Chargers Superfan Guy.
[H/T The Big Lead]
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• A company based in Alabama has devised a way to cremate gun and hunting lovers and turn the ashes into ammunition so they can be shot off for the ultimate send off. Thad Holmes and Clem Parnell, the proprietors of Jyly Holy Smoke LLC, have had only two clients thus far, but are confident business will pick up. “It’s about celebrating life,” Holmes, a 16-year state conservation officer, said on Friday. “We know how strange it sounds to people who aren’t comfortable around guns, but for those who are, it’s not weird at all.” Nope. Not weird at all. [Yahoo!]
• Streetball player tries to dunk over four girls, fails. [Off the Bench]
• Jeremy Shockey rips referees on Twitter, claims account was hacked. [Larry Brown Sports]
• “ESPN Transitions From Arkansas Man-Rack To Sad A&M Rack.” Now that’s a headline. [Busted Coverage]
• Here’s video of Brett Favre’s broadcasting debut. [Awful Announcing]
• Marion Barber is not good at backflips. [Shutdown Corner]
• Aaron Rodgers: the best quarterback in the NFL? [Rumors & Rants]
• Matt Cassell and Todd Haley got into a heated argument on the sideline yesterday. [Outside the Boxscore]
• Japanese synchronized gymnastics? Japanese synchronized gymnastics. [Bob's Blitz]
• Ray Lewis calls plays, is America. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: (Photo) Burger King Introduces New Healthy Deep-Steamed French Fries
