Archive for August, 2011
Some crappy band you have never heard of has initiated a lawsuit against the New Jersey Devils for using its song in a pregame video played in on the screens in the Prudential Center to pump up the fans.
Okay, to be fair to the crappy band in question, maybe some of you out there in Internetland have heard of them: Black Water Rising. Ring a bell? Not me, but given my status as a close-minded musical dinosaur who has settled defiantly into my own comfort zone consisting of musical tastes and acts I have enjoyed over the years and does not take the time to learn anything about new bands and whatnot, I am probably not the best judge of which bands are popular and which bands are not. Now get off my lawn, you disrespecting whippersnappers.
Moving on, Black Water Rising is suing the Devils for $10 million for what they believe is unscrupulous use of their song, “Rise.” They argue they are not being adequately compensated for it being played before games. Unfortunately for the rockers, there is one problem with their legal argument as to why the Devils should line their pockets with more money than they would likely ever earn on the damn song in the first place: Vincent Candilora, a representative of ASCAP (American Society of Composers, Authors and Publishers), told the site SB Nation that the NHL has something called a “blanket, or umbrella license” which grants the league the right to use the crappy song in all its arenas. Yeah.
It’s a whole bunch of legal mumbo jumbo, and I’m no lawyer, nor am I the sharpest knife in the drawer, but the gist of Candilora’s opinion appears to be that the Devils, as a member of the NHL, have the right to use the bands crappy song any way they see fit, and that Black Water Rising’s legal argument doesn’t hold water, no pun intended. Okay, it was intended.
With that in mind, if I were the Devils, I would still remove the song from the video and instead have it played in the arena’s restrooms whenever someone flushes a toilet. Seems fitting to me, as anyone who has used the facilities in a typical pro arena can attest, there is always the risk of some “black water rising,” if you know what I mean. Also, did I mention I think they’re a crappy band? Get it?
And no, I am not going to embed Black Water Rising’s song here. I don’t want to get sued by them.
Band sues New Jersey Devils over use of song video [Sporting News]
Move aside, all the Brad and Angelina’s, David and Victoria’s and Captain & Tennille’s of the world. Sadly, you and the rest of your power couple ilk now have been usurped: Forbes has named New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady and his supermodel wife, Gisele Bündchen, as the highest-earning couple in the world. And really, would we want it any other way?
Via Forbes:
Thanks to a monster year filled with fashion and endorsement deals, not to mention a few business ventures that could put her on the road to becoming the world’s first billionaire supermodel, Bundchen pocketed a massive $45 million over the 12-month period. Not to be overshadowed by his more famous wife, Brady – who signed a four-year, $72 million contract extension in September with the New England Patriots, NFL’s richest deal on an annual basis – brought home another $31 million, putting the couple’s combined annual earnings at $76 million.
Allow me to be the first to congratulate the two on their ascension to the top of list of über-rich celebrity couples. It was a hard-earned title, and more than that, it was much deserved. And we all know what this news indicates for the globetrotting future of Tom and Gisele: more glamorous, booty-shaking vacations to Rio, not to mention more waterslide frivolity. Oh, the waterslides:
The key word for the above photo shoot was tasteful, hence the reason why every member of the Bethany College golf team had golf clubs (with covers) strategically covering their man parts. Unfortunately, much like George Costanza and his foray into the timeless art of seduction, the team obviously put their trust in the wrong person.
Bethany College, a small liberal arts school located in Lindsborg, Kansas and is affiliated with the ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America), had quite the controversy erupt when the above photo began circulating depicting the entire golf team in the buff, posing for a photo for what is being referred to as an unofficial team photo.
For some time now, it’s been quite easy to develop into something of a cynic as a sports fan, and it gets progressively more difficult to avoid that sorry condition with each passing day: fan beatings, corrupt college programs, greed, league lockouts, the list goes on and on. And on. But then a story like this comes along which is so refreshing, so inspirational, it helps us remember why we love sports so much. Even more so, it is a reminder of why many of us began playing sports as wee lads and wee lasses in the first place.
The Aruban baseball team did not fare well in the Little League World Series, not that the squad from the tiny Caribbean island were expected to in the first place. As the team was getting spanked by Chinese Taipei (Taiwan) on Saturday afternoon, reaching the absurd score of 20-0 by the time Chinese-Taipei was at-bat in the top of the fourth. Most players for Aruba were unable to hold in their disappointment any longer and began crying, as they knew another loss would lead to elimination.
Eleven-year-old Vaughn Bergen was among the crushed players from Aruba. As he was about to step to the plate, still crying, his father said to him: “You’re coming up [to bat] here. Do you want to do it crying or do you want to do it happily?” This appeared to shake Vaughn out of his devastated doldrums, and from that point on, he recognized that even though the chips were down, it does not mean you cannot have some fun.
And that’s just what Vaughn Bergen did. As Asia-Pacific scored four runs in the top of the 4th to take the aforementioned 20-0 lead, cameras caught Vaughn doing his best to enjoy the moment…by dancing in the outfield.
Video follows:
I would put this possibly inebriated (or how do I put this delicately: slow-witted, perhaps? Low-bred, maybe?) fan’s actions during last night’s game between the Texas Rangers and Boston Red Sox in the realm of “When Gotta Support The Team Goes Wrong: Bad Idea Jeans Edition.” How else can you explain why Gary, a “big-time Rangers fan,” while he is being interviewed by Fox Sports Southwest’s roaming reporter in the stands at the Ballpark in Arlington, elects to show his team pride (along with his obviously hastily-scrawled “I’m With Them” sign) by knocking off his girlfriend Ashley’s Red Sox cap?
And Ashley is an attractive gal at that. Far be it for me to criticize, but by all appearances, the lovely lady appears to be somewhat out of this guy’s league. Maybe simply be grateful for how the Relationship Gods have blessed you, Bloviating Die-Hard Rangers Fan Guy. Your better half appeared none too pleased with your shenanigans. Next time, profess your support for the Rangers without the unnecessary display of hostility towards your gal’s favorite squad by way of knocking her cap off. Girls don’t like that.
[H/T Sports Grid]
As the man says himself, to be a big deal like Alexander Ovechkin, you have to make the impossible possible. You also have to make the statement with a hard Russian accent and then smile awkwardly after making said proclamation.
What would we NHL fans do during the offseason if it weren’t for Ovie? The guy is the ultimate fodder for the summertime doldrums. The guy is a friggin’ unstoppable force as it relates to off-the-ice entertainment. To be perfectly frank, it is becoming a burdensome task to cite all the occasions Ovechkin has amused us with his shenanigans, offbeat commercials, and so on.
Recently, it was reported that Ovechkin was named as pitchman for Big Deal candy bars, a Canadian-based confection (and the fact that he appears to have put on a bit of weight this offseason lends an additional level of whimsy to the story). As part of his endorsement of the tasty treat, there are now two new commercials making the rounds which feature Ovehckin at his most Oveckin-y. The first one above depicts Ovie helping two lads retrieve their football from the roof by utilizing his ability to carve teleportation portals out of thin air (who knew he was capable of such things?). Naturally, he tells the boys to go long, throws the ball and teleports back down off the roof in time to catch his own pass. Fantastic.
The second installment of the new Big Deal promotions features Ovie swinging candy bar nunchuks. Yep.
Please enjoy the above video until the meanies at MLB put the kibosh on it by invoking copyright infringement rules (update: replaced with embedded version – thanks, MLB.com!) It features Minnesota Twins center fielder Ben Revere making an incredible over-the-shoulder catch of a Vladimir Guerrero shot to the warning track. The fact that Revere runs up the outfield wall in the process makes it all the more impressive. Revere’s miraculous catch and all-around exciting brand of play is at least giving Twins fans something to marvel at while the team plays out the string in an otherwise disappointing season, inspiring fans to reminisce back to the days when Kirby Puckett and then Torii Hunter patrolled the outfield for the Twinkies.
Said Revere (via the Star Tribune):
“I saw the way my glove ran into the wall and I bounced off,” Revere said. “When I saw (Michael) Cuddyer and (Jason) Kubel, their jaws just dropped. … I looked in to make sure it didn’t come out. I was sort of like, I did! It didn’t come out! Wow!”
Wow, indeed. Twins skipper Ron Gardenhire was equally impressed:
“That might be one of the best catches I’ve ever seen considering he ran 50, 60 yards to catch the ball,” Gardenhire said. “And then all the way over his head and jumping into the wall. That’s probably one of the best you’re going to see.”
Between this play and the unconventional triple he hit earlier this season when he somersaulted as he rounded second and headed into third, this kid might give reason for the Twins to have some optimism regarding this kid’s future. The future of the team as a whole? That might be another thing altogether.
UPDATE: See? I told you they would pull it. Watch it here, for now.
Revere’s catch highlights a night when little else goes right for Twins in 4-1 loss to Orioles [Star Tribune]
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• Eco-terrorists are believed to be the culprits behind the ruthless destruction of thousands of papaya trees covering 10 acres of farmland on the big island. The executions were performed under the cover of night and appeared to be done with machetes? Why? Because these papayas were different than the other papayas, in that they were genetically modified, making them targets of hatemongers like eco-terrorists. A majority of the papayas grown on Honolulu are genetically modified which are resistant to a virus which nearly wiped out the fruit on the island. I don’t know, man, but if you ask me, these eco-terrorists are off their gourd, which would be a funny quip if, you know, papayas were gourds. Yeah. [azcentral]
• More NFL programming = good. Versus has now entered the fray with their own show. [Shutdown Corner]
• Hope Solo is tired of answering questions about her posing nude for ESPN the Magazine which is pretty much the only reason anyone is asking her questions in the first place, so it’s kind of strange to be complaining about it. [Off the Bench]
• The Oakland Raiders have finally put an end to the Terrelle Pryor sweepstakes, meaning we can now thankfully stop talking about Terrelle Pryor. [Rumors & Rants]
• LeBron James had a bad week after the NBA Finals. [The Basketball Jones]
• Seahawks coach Pete Carroll is quite the prankster. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Carmelo Anthony and Chris Bosh to guest star on Law & Order: SVU. [That NBA Lottery Pick]
• Don’t have a favorite NFL Team and need to figure out one to root for? Here’s a handy flowchart. [Bob's Blitz]
• Time to look at the crazy crap people do with their hockey sweaters in another edition of “Jersey Fouls.” [Puck Daddy]
• It is also time for another installment of “The Dugout.” This time: SFinal Destination. [With Leather]
• Gus Frerotte’s high school yearbook picture is hilarious. He’s not still in the NFL, is he? [Mr. Irrelevant]
• Proposed titles for the paperback edition of Tim Tebow’s autobiography. [Sports Pickle]
• Peter King is awfully impressed with your sports coat and other Peter King-related idiocy. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: Area Neighbors Protest Tree-House Acquisition of M-80 Technology
Huh? The perennially disappointing Chicago Cubs organization is seeking out new and inventive ways to attempt to change the culture that has become a troubling trademark of the franchise for decades upon decades, generation after generation. Cubs chairman Tom Ricketts, after learning that prospects and new players to the organization know little to nothing about the rich tradition of the team from its glory days way back when has come up with an idea to help the new faces to the team receive a thorough education through which they will learn that the Cubs were once (albeit a long, long, long time ago) a respected and successful franchise. Yep, each prospect will receive a book recounting the team’s long and storied history.
Via the Chicago Tribune:
“I see a lot of things we can do to reinforce the consistency of a Cubs’ message, from Day One until they get to Wrigley Field,” Ricketts said. “One of the things we did this year was to create a little book on Cubs history because we realize most of the young men we drafted don’t know anything about the Cubs except they hadn’t won the World Series in a while.
“We wanted to reinforce the pride and the tradition and the respect they should have, and how fortunate they should be to be in the Cubs organization.”
Yes, fortunate. Although which book exactly was chosen as required reading material was not mentioned in the article, I can probably summarize it thusly: no World Series titles since 1907, no National League pennants since 1945 and lots and lots of losing since then. Throw in a billy goat curse, a black cat and bespectacled buffoon who ruined it all and you got one helluva read. Crap, replace one bespectacled character (Steve Bartman) with another and given the goat, black cats and all the talk of curses, and you’ve practically got yourself a bestselling Harry Potter book.
Cubs trying to change ‘culture’ with book for prospects [Chicago Tribune]
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• Pennsylvania’s Court of Judicial Discipline has dismissed the case against Magisterial District Judge Isaac Stoltzfus, meaning he will not face any discipline related to an incident last September when Stolzfus gave hollowed-out acorns filled with unwrapped condoms to two women outside the capitol. The ruling stated that the judge’s actions “certainly lacks good judgment and must not be repeated” and that his “preoccupation with acorns is mystifying.” Indeed. But perhaps even more mystifying is the final passage in the AP story, which was presented without commentary: “Stoltzfus is a judge in the town of Intercourse but was attending a seminar in Harrisburg.” Town of Intercourse? Wait, what? I gotta call my travel agent and book a trip. [msnbc]
• Rival crew chief pulls hair of driver, sets back masculinity 1,000 years. [Larry Brown Sports]
• At long last, the NCAA intends to repeal the “cream cheese rule.” [Off the Bench]
• Minor league baseball brings us the wackiest triple play ever. [Bob's Blitz]
• A look at who’s in, who’s out of the FedEx Playoffs. [Devil Ball Golf]
• Video of the brawl between 49ers and Raiders fans. [Busted Coverage]
• The Cubs’ mishandling of Jim Hendry’s dismissal is reminiscent of Milton’s firing in Office Space. [Rumors & Rants]
• Could the Coyotes just be sold already? [Puck Daddy]
• Joe Namath tweeted that he loves him some wet cheerleaders. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• The four funniest names from Minor League Baseball. [Bugs & Cranks]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: Lonely Teacher, Outcast Student Begin Somewhat Endearing Sexual Relationship
Ouch. One would expect when a town is known for three things: 1) Having a name loaded with sexual innuendo; 2) Being the locale of the bottling facility for Pluto Water, the nation’s best-selling laxative of the first half of the 20th century; and 3) Being the hometown of one Larry Bird, you would think that incorrectly spelling the great basketball player’s name “Byrd” would have been caught by at least one person during the editing process. It’s Larry freaking Bird, people!
I dunno. Maybe the resort made an egregious error and hired an advertising and marketing firm based out of Hanover, Indiana. Now there’s a doofus town if there ever was one.
[photo credit @TheZRoberts via @darrenrovell]
This is the second time I have gone to the Sports Grid well today, but what can I say? It’s been a slow news day. Wow, that was almost poetic.
Anyhoo, this poor gal shook her stuff and by doing so, got her wish and ended up on the “Shake Cam” at Turner Field when the Atlanta Braves faced the San Francisco Giants. The problem was she was wearing a dress with a shorter hemline, so when she jumped up and down in joy, or shook, as it were, she gave everyone in attendance (and now, the interwebs) an eyeful of her pink panties in all their glory. Excellent. And good for her. The devil-may-care attitude she brought to the ballpark sure is refreshing.
I only wonder if those were the panties her mother laid out for her. Maybe.
[H/T Sports Grid]
Pardon me, a little person. But it was August 19, 1951 when legendary showman Bill Veeck pulled a fast one on the Detroit Tigers when they were facing his St. Louis Browns. Veeck secretly signed Eddie Gaedel to a contract. Gaedel stood 3 feet 7 inches tall and weighed in at 65 pounds. And when Gaedel strolled to the plate as a pinch hitter in the first inning wearing the number “1/8″, it was quite the scene.
Via Wikipedia (because I’m lazy):
Gaedel entered the second half of the doubleheader between the Browns and Detroit Tigers in the bottom of the first inning as a pinch-hitter for leadoff batter Frank Saucier. Immediately, umpire Ed Hurley called for Browns manager Zack Taylor. Veeck and Taylor had had the foresight to have a copy of Gaedel’s contract on hand, as well as a copy of the Browns’ active roster, which had room for Gaedel’s addition.
…
Gaedel was under strict orders not to attempt to move the bat off his shoulder. When Veeck got the impression that Gaedel might be tempted to swing at a pitch, the owner warned Gaedel that he had taken out a $1 million insurance policy on his life, and that he would be standing on the roof of the stadium with a rifle prepared to kill Gaedel if he even looked like he was going to swing. Veeck had carefully trained Gaedel to assume a tight crouch at the plate; he had measured Gaedel’s strike zone in that stance and claimed it was just one and a half inches high. However when Gaedel came to the plate, he abandoned the crouch he had been taught for a pose that Veeck described as “a fair approximation of Joe DiMaggio’s classic style,”leading Veeck to fear he was going to swing. (In the Thurber story, the midget cannot resist swinging at a 3-0 pitch, grounds out, and the team loses the game).
With Bob Cain on the mound – laughing at the absurdity that he actually had to pitch to Gaedel – and catcher Bob Swift catching on his knees, Gaedel took his stance. The Tigers catcher offered his pitcher a piece of strategy: “Keep it low.” Cain delivered four consecutive balls, all high (the first two pitches were legitimate attempts at strikes; the last two were half-speed tosses). Gaedel took his base (stopping twice during his trot to bow to the crowd) and was replaced by pinch-runner Jim Delsing. The 18,369 fans gave Gaedel a standing ovation.
Oh, the good old days. When society turned a blind eye to the exploitation of little people, as long as it was amusing. But those carefree days are no more. Oh, wait.
Photo Credit: Howard Smith-US PRESSWIRE
Do you see him? In the upper left quadrant of the photo wearing a yellow shirt? What is he doing? This photo was taken during the Arizona Diamondbacks-Philadelphia Phillies game on Wednesday night and it is once again a shining example of the unfortunate outcomes that can occur when a moment is frozen in time. Just ask the guy in the Temple t-shirt. It looks like he’s been bitten by the Awkward Photo Bug as well.
An enhanced, close-up photo of Wacky Beer Vendor Guy follows below:
In a totally classy move, team captains Kobe Bryant and Derek Fisher led the way and voted that they and their Los Angeles Lakers teammates donate a share of their playoff bonus to employees who have been affected by the NBA lockout. Chris Bodaken and Patrick O’Keefe, who work in the team’s video department, are two of the 20 employees who have been laid off by the organization as a cost-cutting move. Due to the players’ generosity, they will now split $65,000 to ease the financial strain.
Via the Los Angeles Times:
“He always looks out for people who are lower on the totem pole,” O’Keefe said.
Said Bodaken: “At the end of the day, he told us he was going to take care of us and he did, and that’s not how most people in the world operate. He not only talks the talk. He walks it.”
Well done, Kobe Bryant and assorted teammates. While it may seem like a paltry sum to the players (they reportedly received a total sum of $604,000 in playoff bonuses), that $65,000 is going to go a long way in helping these two dedicated employees weather the unfavorable circumstances put upon them and their families due to the lockout. At least for the foreseeable future. It’s stories like these that help us remember a very important detail regarding the lockout: it’s not only about the millionaire players and billionaire owners. Regular people who work behind the scenes and have little or no input into the negotiation, but perhaps have the biggest stake in the need for a quick resolution, are affected by the lockout as well.
Lakers donate part of playoff bonus to help staff during lockout [Los Angeles Times]
