Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• Well, that’s, um, original. The Longmont (CO) Police Department is on the lookout for a pale-complected woman between the ages of 55 and 75 who pulled off a heist at a Wells Fargo bank inside a Safeway by threatening to give the teller AIDS if she did not cooperate. So, uh, there you go. [Yahoo!]

• DeShawn Stevenson sporting the best smack talking shirt in NBA Finals history. [Midwest Sports Fans]

• Report: Miami Heat players partied with Dallas Mavericks players at Club LIV. [Larry Brown Sports]

• The folks at Ecards are even getting in on the LeBron hating. [Off the Bench]

• The 20 funniest internet reactions to the NBA Finals. [Ranker]

• The “Greater Man Upstairs” responds to LeBron James. [Sports Pickle]

• Photographic evidence of a Sedin triplet. [The Slanch Report]

• This short karate match is really, really short. [Bob's Blitz]

• Check out this Canuck Chick’s vulgar message for Bruins fans. Too bad her squad got destroyed. [Busted Coverage]

• Wayne Rooney is a karaoke master! [Outside the Boxscore]

• Being Buster Olney. [Rumors & Rants]

• Here’s a nifty little LeBron James Flowchart which tells you if he’s going to play a great game. [Ted Williams Head]

• Peter King gave a graduation speech? The horror. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

• Mark Cuban looking like that kid steroid dealer from South Park. [Hugging Harold Reynolds]

• You know, it’s true: rooting for failure can be fun. [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

• The Onion Headline of the Day: Members Of U.S. Women’s Soccer Team Love Each Other Like Sisters And All That S**t