Photoshop Caption: ‘Welcome To Walmart, My Name Is Jim Tressel. Do You Like My Vest?’
It’s funny because if Jim Tressel, after running out of other career options, elected to take a job as a Walmart greeter, he would at least still get to wear a vest to his job every day.
The above Photoshop, courtesy of Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker LaMarr Woodley, depicts disgraced former Ohio State football coach Jim Tressel suffering the indignity of having to smile and be cordial to the absolute dregs of society: Walmart customers. But I wonder why Woodley is clearly taking such glee in the utter embarrassment currently being suffered by Buckeye Nation…
(checks out Woodley’s bio)
Aha. Woodley played his college football at the University of Michigan. That makes a lot of sense. I bet he – and every single Michigan alum who has watched OSU dominate the rivalry during the Tressel years (9-1 against the Wolverines) – is absolutely loving this.
As an aside, to be perfectly honest, I couldn’t care less about OSU or Jim Tressel or how this entire debacle quickly evolved from minor annoyance for the football program into all-encompassing scandal. What? A college football coach, who arrogantly believes he was above the law and not only scoffs at the rules and regulations of the NCAA but overtly lies when questioned about violations of those rules and regulations as well? I thought every single one of these guys were the pinnacles of integrity, honor and righteousness. Now you’re telling me that some of them may not be as incorruptible as they present themselves? That the carefully cultivated public persona put forth by a college football coach could very well just be a huge damn lie? Color me shocked!
Nevertheless, despite my ambivalence regarding Tressel’s unceremonious resignation, the guy deserves everything that’s coming to him. Even if that means taking a part-time job as a greeter at Walmart. Not that Tressel will likely suffer such a horrific fate. Conniving men like Tressel always seem to manage to land on their feet. But if he does, at least Tressel does have some experience dealing with the caliber of people who frequent that hellhole of commerce.
UPDATE: I unknowingly did not give credit where credit is due for the above Photoshop brilliance. The excellent work was performed by Deadspin commenter Polk Panther. Check out some of his other phenomenal stuff over on Tumblr. Thanks, Polk Panther. Keep ’em coming.