Archive for November, 2010
All I hope is there isn’t an argument over the last turkey drumstick. You know how hockey players can get…
Hopefully, the Sutters can keep their respective business and personal lives separate if the family does in fact sit down for Thanksgiving dinner, as the Flames GM has traded his son Brett and defenseman Ian White to the Carolina Hurricanes for winger Tom Kostopoulos and defenceman Anton Babchuk.
While the trade came within a week of Brett being charged with assault stemming from an incident at an Arizona bar, the Flames insist that the trade talks were ongoing well before the alleged scuffle, according to Flames assistant GM Jay Feaster (via TSN):
“This discussion took place going back to the end of October, beginning of November,” Feaster said on a conference call. “He was a player that Carolina identified as someone that they wanted in the deal. So it evolved from there.”
Sutter was expendable, having been recently assigned to the American Hockey League after being a healthy scratch in 12 consecutive games prior to the demotion, so the trade made sense from a business standpoint, but it must have been awkward for the Sutters from a familial perspective. Obviously, Papa Sutter understands that business is business.
“One of the things that Darryl has always prided himself on is being able to separate out the personal relationship and the business aspect of what it is that we do,” said Feaster. “We were in a situation where Brett was not playing, he was not able to crack the starting lineup and hadn’t played in an extended period of time. …
“It was a decision that was made … in the best interest of the hockey club.”
Hopefully, there will be no hard feelings between father and son. At the very least, it would be nice for them to figure out a way to have a harmonious holiday season. I guess staying out of Arizona bars would be a good start and lets hope Darryl doesn’t try to trade Brett to the other team in the annual Sutter Family Turkey Bowl football game. That would be awkward indeed.
FLAMES DEAL SUTTER, WHITE TO CANES FOR BABCHUK, KOSTOPOULOS [TSN/The Canadian Press]
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• Actually, it is only one preschooler who was discovered to have crack in his shoe, but that’s still something, right? A three-year-old girl in Boston complained about her foot hurting and when she removed her shoe, 17 bags of crack were found in it. Turns out the crack belonged to a friend of the girl’s mother. Yeesh. [azcentral]
• FOX will be the broadcast home of the first six Big Ten Championship games. [Awful Announcing]
• Shocker: The brittle Greg Oden to have microfracture surgery and is out for the season. [The Last Angry Fan]
• The NCAA has stated it has no plans to expand past current 68-team field. At least until they have plans to expand past the current 68-team field. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Frank Deford, God love ‘em, has equated the wrong ball football trick which has turned into a YouTube favorite to child abuse. [Out of Bounds]
• Ha. Clyde Drexler thinks Kyle Korver looks like Ashton Kutcher. [That NBA Lottery Pick]
• Ladies and gentlemen, Felix Hernandez as Jules Winnfield from Pulp Fiction. [Tirico Suave]
• Tiger Woods to appear on Mike & Mike this morning. [Wei Under Par]
• Ha, again: this guy plays for Duke. [straitpinkie]
• Shannon Brown is looking for a new nickname. Here are some suggestions. [The Basketball Jones]
• Gourmet Spud’s reflections: “After His Fourth Tour, The Pressures of Paintball Became Too Much for Gordon to Bear” [Food Court Lunch]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: Okay-Looking Guy Meets Kind-Of-Pretty Girl
Via ESPN:
Tiger Woods, in a first-person essay published Wednesday, said he’s “regaining the balance that I’d lost” before his car accident a year ago sent his life into a tailspin.
That’s tough, man. Not only has Tiger Woods had to deal with the embarrassment of having the many seedy and previously unknown aspects of his personal life exposed, and with that, the subsequent crumbling of his marriage, he has also been attempting to handle living his life with vertigo. For those who are not familiar with it, vertigo is a completely debilitating condition that was given the attention it deserves on the show Arrested Development, courtesy of the magnificent, yet vulnerable, performance of Liza Minnelli in her portrayal of Lucille Austero.
I’m just shocked that Tiger was dealing with vertigo even before the crash. One can only imagine how an accident could amplify the symptoms.
Tiger, just so you know, your fans are here for you as you try to pick up the pieces of your shattered life and career. We know you can do it. It might seem like it is a long road ahead of you, but you just have to keep your head up. But not for too long. We don’t need you getting dizzy and bumping that head of yours. You know, because of the vertigo.
Tiger Woods writes first-person essay [ESPN]
It’s 4:19, You Gotta Minute?
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• Amid the already tawdry allegations in the Tony Parker-Eva Longoria divorce: Parker is being accused of sending 100s of texts to a Spurs teammate’s wife. [Larry Brown Sports]
• The New York Daily News would like to remind everybody that Michael Vick was a dog killer. [Hugging Harold Reynolds]
• Brian Wilson hung out with some Hollywood starlets, sans The Machine. [Bob's Blitz]
• Mike Tyson to open a chain of high-end kosher restaurants. Of course he is. [Deuce of Davenport]
• An amusing series of Brittney Griner photoshops. [TAUNTR]
• Coco Crisp is looking for services from a woman by using Craigslist. [Ted Williams Head]
• The hottest mom in Lingerie Football suffered a gnarly season-ending injury. Yamma hamma. [Busted Coverage]
• Wisconsite shoots out television with shotgun because he was so angry about Briston Palin’s dancing. If that isn’t strange enough for you, it gets weirder. [Out of Bounds]
• Blue Menu brings us a message from the Mexico Tourism Board. [Food Court Lunch]
• The Onion Headline of the Day, Part II: World’s Power Brokers Hold Annual Summit Where They Show Each Other Their Penises
Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
In light of the news that Kenny Chesney is donating 10,000 copies of his documentary, The Boys of Fall, on DVD to high school coaches around the country, it becomes perfectly clear that when it comes to doing good deeds in the service of sweaty young men, Kenny Chesney is most certainly a top. I mean, the tops. What I’m getting at is the fact that Chesney believes that his documentary could help inspire young men and teach them that through hard work and putting their nose to the grindstone, they too can rise from the power bottom and work their way to being on top, right where they belong…as long as they are comfortable with that, but only if they commit to the concept of teamwork by getting behind their teammates and pushing. Hard.
Ah hell, I’ve done enough damage already. I could go on, but instead, here’s the press release announcing Chesney’s charitable side, via his official site:
In an effort to inspire young athletes both on and off the field, Kenny Chesney is offering a free DVD copy of ‘Boys of Fall,’ his 90-minute documentary about the lasting, positive impact high school football has on players throughout their lives, to high schools and high school football coaches around the US.
In the documentary, Chesney interviews dozens of football’s most successful commentators, coaches and players, including Joe Namath, Peyton Manning, Tony Dungy and Nick Saban, but the focus of the film is truly on life lessons learned by all who participate, not just those who go on to future football success.
“Kenny played high school football, and he feels the lessons learned on the field like hard work, humility and trust are carried over into everyday life,” says Chesney’s manager Clint Higham. “He wants to help inspire future generations with the same passion he feels.”
Sounds great. No, really. I bet Chesney feels if he can touch one young man they way Peyton Manning has touched him on numerous occasions, the donation of 10,000 DVDs will be quite rewarding. And hey, I bet it will be a lot easier than faking his way through a loveless “marriage” to Renee Zellweger.
Va Va Va Voom Vonn! Hubba hubba. Now that’s what I call putting your best foot forward. Or leg. Or whatever.
As you can see, the upcoming issue of ESPN The Magazine is a “Movie Spectacular!” and how about everybody’s favorite sexy Olympian, Miss Lindsey Vonn, completely nailing Catherine Tramell – the hypersexed, potentially homicidal temptress seductively portrayed by Sharon Stone in the classic film, Basic Instinct – for the issue’s cover? Well, perhaps “completely nailing Catherine Tramell” isn’t the best way to put it. Wait. Why yes, yes it is.
Anyhoo, here’s the digs on this so-called “Movie Spectacular!” issue (via ESPN Media Zone):
ESPN The Magazine’s deep-dive, single-topic-focused format will tackle the movie industry when its first-ever “Film Issue” hits newsstands Friday, Nov. 19. The issue explores the industry’s best sports movies, gives pointers on how “not to make a football flick” and asks sports figures to rate the film adaptation of their lives in the feature “Scale of 1 to 10.” The issue’s cover features Olympic Skier Lindsey Vonn who channels Sharon Stone as Basic Instinct’s Catherine Tramell. Vonn is joined by fellow athletes in reenacting iconic movie scenes, including Danica Patrick as Anchorman’s Veronica Corningstone and Tank Johnson, Chad Ochocinco and Dhani Jones as The Hangover’s Zach Galifianakis Ed Helms and Bradley Cooper.
Ooh la la – Danica Patrick as Veronica Corningstone? Not too shabby. Although if it were up to me, I would have had Patrick stick to what she knows and channeled a character from a movie dealing with the world of auto racing. And why not go with perhaps the sexiest character ever from a racing movie? That’s right folks: I am of course referring to Brewster Baker, a character brought to life by none other than Kenny Rogers in the 1982 classic, Six Pack. Talk about dreamy.
Um, moving on, a behind-the-scenes video of Vonn’s sexy, sultry photo shoot follows.
Despite initial reports to the contrary which were flying around all over the internets yesterday, CBS and Turner Sports have reportedly no firm plans in place to use Charles Barkley, Kenny Smith, Marv Albert, or any other NBA on TNT broadcasters during its coverage of the 2011 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament.
Via Sports Media Watch:
The Associated Press reported on Tuesday that Turner would use Albert, Smith and Barkley on its NCAA Tournament coverage in March. According to the report, CBS and Turner executives confirmed that the announcers would be part of the coverage.
However, Sports Media Watch learned on Wednesday that nothing is definitely in place for the network’s coverage of the NCAA Tournament.
What the fungus? If you had Charles Barkley in your arsenal of announcers, which Turner Sports does, it would be ridiculous not to utilize his considerable broadcasting talents? Not doing so would be about as silly as going to Taco Bell and not getting yourself one of those delectably delicious $5 Buck Boxes. Ain’t that right, Sir Charles?
Turner Has No Definitive Plans To Use Barkley, Smith, Albert, on NCAA Tournament [Sports Media Watch]
If the annual appearance by the woeful Detroit Lions wasn’t a bad enough way to kick-start your Thanksgiving Day celebration with family, friends or fellow inmates, along comes news that they have upped the crap ante by announcing that Kid Rock will be the halftime entertainment during the Detroit-New England game on Turkey Day. That’s right, if you thought you had enough of Kid Rock’s song, “Born Free,” after getting ear-and-eye-raped by it (“Hey! Kid Rock performs derivative, trite, patriotically-pandering songs without his shirt on – he must be cool!”) throughout the MLB playoffs on TBS (among other places), you ain’t done with him or his annoying song yet. Word on the street is that he will perform the titular song during his halftime performance. What? No duets with Sheryl Crow? That stinks!
So, when kicking back after the big meal – if you happen to be one of those weird families who eat super early – seriously, what is up with that? Dinner at 1:00? That leaves no time to adequately satiate yourself with liquor prior to engorging yourself) – and you feel a wave of nausea running over you, it probably isn’t from Grandma’s overly-sagey stuffing (and anyone who puts raisins in stuffing should be sent to a Holiday Meal Internment Camp), it’s instead the likelihood that you overheard Kid Rock’s performance. Here’s the deal, to quote the song, “You can knock me down and watch me bleed, but you can’t keep no chains on me.” And believe me, chaining me up to the sofa is about the only way of getting me to watch that sure-to-be halftime crapfest.
Tiger Woods Tweets! Tiger Woods Tweets!
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Big news out of the Twittersphere. After lying dormant for nearly a year-and-a-half, just moments ago, Tiger Woods popped his personal Twitter cherry by personally tweeting a message to his followers.
Sure, his initial foray into the world of social media will not be nearly as satisfying (on many levels) as the last time he decided to put himself out there and “try out” something, my guess this will be an excellent way for Woods to connect with his fans. Once again, not on quite the same level as the last time he tried to connect with his many admirers, but an enjoyable experience nonetheless. To put it plainly, I guess what I’m getting at here is at the present time, Tiger is on Twitter, not on (top of) floozies. Which is good. Mostly.
What you see above is concept art for one of the coolest things I have ever heard of: Parabounce.
What’s Parabounce, you ask? It’s simple. At least according to twisted genius Stephen Meadows, the brains behind the brilliant idea for Parabounce Vegas, a planned 100,000-square-foot facility near the Strip where 20 customers at a time will be able to fly around the gigantic facility while strapped to 22-foot helium balloons, soaring hundreds of feet in the air. That’s crazy stuff, man.
Bikini-clad cheerleaders have caused a sexy controversy at the Asian Games after a player for the Yemeni beach volleyball team claimed the comely gals were a distraction, ultimately blaming a loss to Indonesia on the volleyball vixens. Ha. Now that’s an excuse I can get behind.
Said Yemen beach volleyballer Adeeb Mahfoudh to the Tianfu Morning News, a newspaper I read every day (via AsianGames.Dawn.com):
“They had an effect on how we played. I think they had something to do with our losing the match.”
I bet they did, Adeeb, I bet they did. Despite losing, Mahfoudh was nevertheless enchanted by the girls, one of four cheerleader squads, each comprised of eight girls in swimsuits who have been hired to provide entertainment and of course, raise spirits.
“These girls are very beautiful. With them here, more people will pay attention to beach volleyball,” smiled Mahfoudh.
“If I can, I hope to watch them perform at the next match.”
Now, that’s a much better plan. Try to ignore the girls while playing and then focus on their sexy, cheery ways afterward. Too bad Mahfoudh learned that lesson the hard way. I guess you could competitors like Mahfoudh, instead of giving 100% effort by going to the sand to dig one out, were much more focused on getting back to the locker room ASAP to rub one out.
Bikini girls too hot for Asian Games [AsianGames.Dawn.com]
While being good for his overall health, John Daly’s dramatic weight loss has unfortunately had an ill-effect on one aspect of his life intricately interwoven into the well-being of his overall golf game: his putting stroke.
Daly, who had ballooned to 322 pounds before undergoing surgery and fitted with an gastric band in February of 2009, has dropped an amazing 126 pounds over the past 18 months. Daly is now a svelte 196 pounds and the lack of fat around his middle, previously zones has caused a disturbance relating to the performance of his putter.
Via FOX Sports:
“The biggest problem has been the putter — I have nowhere to put my elbows,” Daly explained. “I used to be able to put my elbows right on my love handles and that was pretty good. Now they are all over the place.”
Boy, I know how that goes. That’s why I have made the difficult decision to not lose any weight. And believe me, I am fully committed to this remaining plump for putting plan. Here’s the deal: my skills on the course are shaky enough as it is without making a change that could prove detrimental to my already hacky, horrid golf game. I don’t need to be all skinny and healthy and end up being an ever crappier golfer, thank you very much.And I guess that it’s true, the extra weight around the midsection – a flabby center of gravity, if you will – really can provide some much needed stability when standing over a putt. And the next one. And, sigh, the next one.
Daly says weight loss affects putting [FOX Sports]
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, comments and complaints to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• After Eric Easley was charged with animal cruelty for allegedly sexually assaulting a miniature horse, he went out and got the best attorney in the business to represent him – or at least the best attorney who know how to handle messy cases involving sexual mistreatment of an animal: “Cowboy” Bob Clark. Here’s what Cowboy Bob had to say on Tuesday regarding the case, riffing on the old “You can indict a ham sandwich” adage in his own unique cowboy way: “”You can accuse a bishop in Boston of bastardy, but that don’t mean he did anything. You can get a ham sandwich and indict it, but that don’t mean the ham sandwich was guilty of anything, except being a bad ham sandwich.” Very true, but did the ham sandwich bang a horse? That’s the question. [MSNBC]
• So, the contract that the Redskins gave Donovan McNabb isn’t as godawful as originally believed. [Larry Brown Sports]
• My pal PUNTE takes a moment to give thanks…for once. [With Leather]
• Michigan State might be taking on North Carolina in a basketball game on an aircraft carrier? Wha? [Detroit4Lyfe]
• Yeah, someone’s probably going to die at the Illinois-Northwestern game at Wrigley Field. [Busted Coverage]
• Time for this week’s mascot power rankings. [Out of Bounds]
• That Fake Andy Reid in the stands on Monday night? He’s got his own YouTube account. [The700Level]
• Cute video of a kid dancing at the Kentucky-Vanderbilt football game. [Bob's Blitz]
• Not surprisingly, the four remaining Mets managerial candidates fail to inspire or capture the imagination of Mets fans. [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]
• This is exactly why you don’t go to eat at Denny’s in Oakland. [Ted Williams Head]
• Denzel Washington’s wife got jacked up at her son’s UFL game. [Outside the Boxscore]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: NFL Sends Thousands Of Volunteers To Help Clean Up NFC West
It’s 4:19, You Gotta Minute?
Posted by:• You stay classy, Miami Heat: team has banned a Cleveland reporter from the arena. [The Basketball Jones]
• Holy kick ass Pop-A-Shot shooting chick, Batman! [Tirico Suave]
• The Steelers press release announcing about cutting Jeff Reed is awesome. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Presenting the Periodic Table of Hall of Famers. [Big League Stew]
• It truly is amazing that the Eagles won so convincingly last night in light of having two Andy Reid’s in the stadium. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• Darnell Dockett’s tweet regarding Michael Vick’s performance was classic. [Ted Williams Head]
• A documentary was made about Kevin Love’s awkward handshaking abilities. [Steady Burn]
• Hilarious: guy gets his ponytail caught in weightlifting machine. [Bob's Blitz]
• Golfer In-Kyung Kim wins LPGA event, donates entire winnings to charity. [Devil Ball Golf]
• Here are six suggestions how Versus can improve its new NHL program. [Puck Daddy]
• The Onion Headline of the Day, Part II: 911 Operator Patiently Explains That, No, You Can’t Die Of Hangover
Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
If you hadn’t heard, sophomore Texas Longhorns tailback ‘Tre Newton announced Monday that due to a history of concussions, he has made the decision to quit playing the game that he loves due to concerns regarding the potential long-term effects of his head injuries. As opposed to rolling the dice with his future, Newton has elected to play it safe and walk away with his health essentially intact instead of tempting fate. Newton, who is the son of former Cowboys great Nate Newton, displayed wisdom well beyond his years when he said (via The Dallas Morning News):
“After sitting down and talking with them and my parents, what’s best for my long-term future is to stop playing,” Newton said.
“It’s really tough. I love the game of football. It’s something I’ve been involved with ever since I’ve been born.”
Despite how tough it was for Newton to come to this decision, it is nice to know that he at least has the support of his teammates, some of whom spoke publicly regarding how Newton chose to preserve his long-term health over the temporary glory one can achieve on the football field. Two such teammates who came out publicly to support their teammate’s decision were defensive backs Aaron Williams and Blake Gideon. While their hearts may have been in the right place, their statements certainly revealed that they just don’t get it, on so many levels. To wit (via The Dallas Morning News):
“I support Tre’ but for me personally, I’d die on that field,” Williams said.
“I always go 100 miles per hour and will worry about all that health stuff 10 years from now when I’m done playing,” Gideon said. “I’m making memories now. We all knew what we were signing up for when we started playing football.”
Hoo boy. The folly of youth, manifested in a perceived aura of invincibility. Of course, all football players know what they are signing up for when they decide to play football, but the hubris displayed by these two men with their comments is truly astounding. Williams’ reckless assertion aside, as far as Gideon’s thoughts are concerned, what good will those memories serve 10 years from now if the accumulated toll of the head injuries sustained leaves a person unable to remember those fond memories let alone wax nostalgic about the glory days of their time playing football? That’s the reason behind the difficult decision your teammate had to make, Gideon. Think about it, while you still can.
Longhorn: ‘I support Tre’ but for me personally, I’d die on that field’ [The Dallas Morning News]
Texas RB Tre Newton, son of former Cowboys legend, ends football career after multiple concussions [The Dallas Morning News]
