Archive for August, 2010
I like to think as the Sportress as the internet’s go-to site for breaking, up-to-the-minute news from the world of sports, so allow me to drop this mind-blowing nugget of knowledge on you guys:
The 2010 NFL season kicks off next week.
I know! Crazy, right? But just in case this kind of information were to somehow slip through the cracks, the NFL is spending a buttload of cash in an advertising campaign over the next week to make sure everyone is adequately apprised of this seemingly unknown tidbit of information.
Via The Miami Herald:
The league is running ads for “Back to Football” on its broadcast partners NBC, CBS, FOX, ESPN, and NFL Network. All are using the slogan, too.
Retailers Kohl’s, Dick’s and Old Navy are also running promotions and featuring NFL merchandise.
In all, the league estimates total media spending by the NFL and its sponsors to be worth $50 million on the campaign, which it plans to run each year from July through the season’s start in early September.
Obviously, $50 million is a pittance when it comes to an aggressive marketing campaign in this day and age, especially for an entity that makes money hand over fist like the NFL. But under what kind of rock do you have to be living under to not be aware that the NFL season is set to kick off? Crap, those Chilean miners have already done their fantasy football draft and set their rosters for the first week, for Christ’s sake, and they have been trapped 2,300 feet below the Earth’s surface since early August. I just hope someone had the decency to inform them that Brett Favre came back.
NFL plans $50M “Back to Football” campaign [The Miami Herald]
It’s 4:19, You Gotta Minute?
Posted by:
• Is it possible that Tiger Woods has purchased a Manhattan bachelor pad? Sure, anything is possible, but it’s not bloody likely. [Out of Bounds]
• Brilliant video editing work depicting what it would be like if Jay Mariotti discussed Jay Mariotti on Around the Horn. [TAUNTR]
• Do you want to know how bad Boston dickbag Dan Shaughnessy is? He’s making a die-hard Yankees fan, Rob Iracane, pray for the team’s collapse just to prove the ginger wrong. [Walkoff Walk]
• Just because the Cardinals are playing like shit doesn’t mean their official site should point it out in the headline of the game recap. [Joe Sports Fan]
• Video of a hockey mom in the stands getting drilled by a puck. [Puck Daddy]
• Roger Federer is a tennis trick shot maestro. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Will we ever see Sergio Garcia the golfer ever again? God, I hope so. [Devil Ball Golf]
• Brian Billick’s thoughts on “certain language” as it pertains to Rex Ryan. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• The Onion Headline of the Day, Part II: When You Think McDonough’s Auto Repair, You Think Craftsmanship, Murder, And Pride
Send tips, links, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
Last week, I was contacted by a public relations firm who wanted to see if I’d be interested in helping Johnsonville Sausage get the word out regarding a new fantasy football-type contest called the “Rush for 2,000 Yards Challenge”. After rendering me completely incapacitated by overindulging my weakness for beer-soaked bratwurst, I was in no position not to comply. Read on:
Sheboygan Falls, Wis. (Aug. 16, 2010) – Johnsonville Sausage today announced the launch of its “Rush for 2,000 Yards Challenge” Fantasy Football game. Through the online game, which kicks off today and runs through Jan. 2, 2011, football fans will compete to win the “ultimate fan cave,” featuring their choice of televisions, speaker systems and other items.
“Johnsonville Sausage and football season go hand-in-hand, whether you’re tailgating in the stadium parking lot or enjoying the week’s rivalries from the comfort of your family room,” said Chris O’Toole, brand manager for Johnsonville Sausage. “We’re excited to provide football fans and consumers another exciting way to enjoy the season and get in on the action through the ‘Rush for 2,000 Yards Challenge.’”
How the “Rush for 2,000 Yards Challenge” Works:
Fans can sign up to play at www.johnsonville.com. Each week, participants will select one running back (whom they have not selected in a prior week), and that running back’s yards for the week become their yards. The goal is to have the most rushing yards each week and to have the most cumulative yards at the end of the season. Weekly prizes will be awarded to those participants with the most rushing yards that week, and the player with the most cumulative rushing yards at the end of the season will win the grand prize “ultimate fan cave.”
In addition to allowing consumers to showcase their football knowledge and skills through some friendly competition, Johnsonville and Athlon Sports will be providing Rush for 2,000 participants the latest in fantasy football news, as well as tips and recipes to help make the football viewing experience better than ever this year. Content on the game’s Web site will be updated regularly, and football fans can check back each week to get the latest inside scoop from the league, giving them an advantage to make the best selections for the this season’s game.
Sounds simple enough, right? So why don’t you go ahead and hop on over to the official site, register and show them how football-savvy the typical Sportress reader can be. Don’t let me down, ya ingrates. Now, you have your orders. Get moving.
Jeez, talk about your tough round.
A golfer at the Shady Canyon Golf Course in Irvine, California made what has to be considered a one-in-a-million shot Saturday after finding himself stuck in the rough that lines one of the course’s fairways. Trying to blast his ball out of the rough, the unidentified golfer presumably struck some kind of a rock, sending off a spark which ignited what developed into a 12-acre fire. It took nearly seven hours and two hundred firefighters to finally contain the blaze.
Now that’s some serious on-course pyrotechnics. Take that, Tiger Woods.
Fires in Shady Canyon contained [Orange County Register]
Yassir Arafat, Winston Churchill, Stephen Hawking, Jimmy Carter, Albert Einstein…Dana White?
That’s right, UFC President Dana White joins the above individuals on the veritable who’s who list of luminaries from the words of science and politics who have been previously invited by the Oxford Union Society to speak in front of the esteemed institute of higher learning’s debate club. White’s appearance is scheduled for October 13th and it is sure to be an intellectually stimulating experience for one and all.
To his credit and all kidding aside, White, who will be in London already for UFC 120 on October 16th, is an incredibly-gifted speaker who, solely on the basis of his domineering personality and never-say-die attitude has transformed the UFC into an incredibly successful, billion dollar juggernaut.
Via ESPN:
“Anyone who knows anything about me knows I always speak my mind and am very passionate about what I do, and the Oxford Union was founded on exactly those principles,” White said in a statement released by UFC. “I’m looking forward to meeting the students, and I know they have a reputation for asking tough questions and expecting straight answers from their guests. That’s exactly what they’ll get from me.
I wish I could think of something sarcastic or witty to say about the Oxford Union’s, shall we say, unique choice in speaker, but the guy is an incredibly compelling figure and will certainly enlighten and entertain the students. And if for some reason the students have a problem with him, White can simply put each one of those pasty little bastards in some kind of submission move until those pencil-necked geeks tap out and beg for him to continue.
Dana White invited to speak at Oxford [ESPN]
Who says the stereotypical sports fan is a sloppy, knuckle-dragging troglodyte who could give a rip about fashion and style? Well, to be honest, I would, but how then could I explain our collective fascination with the hairstyles of professional athletes which has taken the internets by storm this week? First it was Troy Polamalu and the publicity stunt pulled by Head & Shoulders when the shampoo took out a $1 million insurance policy with Lloyd’s of London on the safety’s hair. Next up was the news that the St. Louis Cardinals all shaved their heads in some misguided attempt to inspire team unity and currently, everyone is talking about whether Manny Ramirez will show up sans dreadlocks when he makes his first appearance with his new team, the White Sox, due to the the team’s strict policy covering the appearances of its players.
Said White Sox GM Kenny Williams (via the Chicago Tribune):
“We have a certain way we like to have our players represent us, and that was discussed quite some time ago with one of my coaches,” Williams said Monday in response to a question about the Sox’s rules governing appearance and Ramirez’s dreadlocks.
“We’ll just wait and let you see how they decide to handle it. From my understanding, it’s not going to be an issue, and he’s going to make an adjustment and conform to how we like to have our players represented out there.”
The anticipation is simply killing me! You know what we need? More coverage entirely dedicated to the intersection of fashion and sports. I can see it now: ESPN Fashion! with Mario Lopez as the host. The guy has previous experience with the network on ESPN Hollywood (which shockingly lasted three entire episodes) and it couldn’t get much worse than that televised abomination, could it? Yeah, on second thought, I guess it could. But that doesn’t mean ESPN won’t take a shot.
Finally, since this post is about haircuts, I would be remiss if I did not make a reference to the song “Cut Your Hair” by Pavement. I believe that’s in the blogger bylaws, folks. Nothing I can do about it.
And one last thing: hey, Manny: NO BIG HAIR!!
Will Manny lose the dreadlocks? [Chicago Tribune]
Cut ups: Cardinals get new ‘dos [AP]
(previously at the Sportress: Head & Shoulders Took Out $1 Million Insurance Policy On Troy Polamalu’s Hair)
By all accounts, Stewart Mandel is an incredibly talented and knowledgeable journalist who does a bang-up job covering college football for Sports Illustrated, but seriously? It’s not even September yet and we’re forecasting potential bowl matchups? And we’re not even talking about the BCS bowls, which one could argue would be at least a more manageable, less maddening endeavor. I am certainly not knowledgeable enough to go through Mandel’s projections and pinpoint where he may have a matchup wrong, but even if I was, what would be the point in doing so? So many things can occur between now and December that could cause this entire thing to completely come apart at the seams, not to mention, as Mandel points out himself, that “bowls are NOT obligated to choose their teams in exact order of conference standings.” So, not only is one dealing with a multitude of teams and millions of scenarios which are impossible to forecast, but also the arbitrary whims of bowl committees.
At the same time, what’s worse? Someone taking the time to predict all 35 bowl matchups or me taking the time to complain about it? That’s a tough one to call as well.
Projecting all 35 bowl matchups [SI]
I have been leafing through my Oxford English Dictionary in an attempt to find a more appropriate term to describe what it is like to watch the the above video of the panelists on Around the Horn discuss cohort Jay Mariotti’s arrest (transcript here). Unfortunately, I have had minimal success in finding a word that adequately encompasses how squirm-inducing the entire process was to behold, not only for the viewers watching it, but for Kevin Blackistone, Woody Paige and Bob Ryan to participate in the discussion as well. I imagine Tim Cowlishaw was quite relieved that his consistently half-assed performance on the show left him once again the first panelist eliminated so he didn’t have to participate in this trainwreck.
Perhaps some clarification is in order. The panelists didn’t so much discuss Mariotti’s arrest as address the subsequent media coverage and the vitriolic, almost gleeful reaction which erupted in response to Mariotti’s so-called fall from grace, for lack of a better way of putting it.
Ultimately, Around the Horn should be given a lot of credit for actually addressing the issue, even in the limited context in which it did instead of ignoring it and burying their heads in the sand which I expected them to do. So here’s your gold star, Around the Horn. Kudos.
And speaking of the Oxford English Dictionary, the news that it is beginning to make the transition to solely an online, digital presence and will only have a print version if demand calls for it reminds me of Mariotti’s career metamorphosis from print to online journalist. The only difference being that unlike Mariotti, the OED actually has a future on the internet.
[H/T for video to Deadspin]
Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. If you happen to be so inclined, send tips, links, comments and complaints to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
• A Massachusetts man has been arrested for cocaine trafficking after a kilo of cocaine stuffed in a hollowed out chunk of bologna was delivered to his home after authorities discovered the cocaine. An undercover postal inspector delivered the package to the man’s home and once it was signed for, arrested a 30-year-old man. The street value of the coke was estimated to be $100,000. [Yahoo!/AP]
• It’s difficult to ascertain why people continue to believe that Pete Rose has a gambling problem. Wait. [Out of Bounds]
• It was a busy weekend in baseball as far as replay was concerned. [With Leather]
• Frank Thomas got pretty emotional during his White Sox jersey retirement ceremony on Sunday. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Rick’s Cabaret has offered A’s pitcher Brett Anderson (who uploaded a photo of himself posing with a couple of chicks while holding wads a cash) a special night if he beats the Yankees this week. [Busted Coverage]
• Is it bad for a soccer goalie to give up a goal off a shot from 70-yards out? Ask this Russian guy. [Ted Williams Head]
• Roger Clemens was the epitome of style at his court hearing yesterday with his ugly tie and frosted tips. No he wasn’t. [The Sports Hernia Blog]
• The Top 10 reasons Troy Polamalu insured his hair. [Five Tool Tool]
• World Cup superfan Larissa Riquelme is still finding ways to stay in the public eye. [Bob's Blitz]
• The Onion Headline of the Day: Local Fabric Store Urges You To Check Them Out On Twitter
Alright, Wilfork didn’t exactly go all Henry Hill voiceover-in-Goodfellas during his appearance on WEEI radio earlier today when discussing the NFL’s possible expansion of its regular season from 16 to 18 games, but one message came across loud and clear: if players are going to play 18 games, they better be getting paid for playing 18 games.
Via ESPN Boston:
“If you want to pay us like preseason, it won’t work. The pay has to be different, that’s point blank,” Wilfork said Monday during his weekly appearance on sports radio WEEI with co-hosts Dale Arnold and Michael Holley.
“Me personally, a fan of football, I care less about 18-, 20-game seasons as long as the pay is right. Don’t pay me as four preseason games when it’s only two preseason games, and the other two are regular-season games. If you want it like that, well, you have to come out of your pockets for it. … It won’t work if you put an 18-game season together and expect guys to play two games for preseason salary. It would be a big problem.”
Well put. Wilfork apparently realizes that the NFL considers players nothing more than a mercenaries, so if the league expects them to put their long-term health and well-being on the line for two additional games, the owners shouldn’t be the only ones whose wallets get fatter: players better damn well be making some more money off it, too. But Vinnie (I call him Wilfork “Vinnie”) was the kind of guy that rooted for bad guys in the movies, so there you go.
Wilfork chimes in on expanded season [ESPN Boston]
It’s 4:19, You Gotta Minute?
Posted by:• Elin might take some of the money she got from Tiger to open a mental health clinic. [Out of Bounds]
• The best and the worst of EA Sports’ NHL video game commercials. [Puck Daddy]
• Petco Park Dog Day was a big, butt-sniffing success. [Larry Brown Sports]
• Holy ugly NFL camouflage jerseys, Batman! [The700Level]
• The St. Louis Cardinals don’t quite understand the concept of social media. [Joe Sports Fan]
• With the MLB playoffs set to begin on TBS in about a month, you better get ready to start getting sick of Conan O’Brien [Walkoff Walk]
• That A’s ballboy and the girl he charmed at the stadium were on Inside Edition today. [Busted Coverage]
• My pal Ryan Ballengee gives us his two-cents on Michelle Wie’s second career win at the Canadian Women’s Open. [Waggle Room]
• Once again, everybody is forgetting about the hookers. Somebody think of the hookers. [Deuce of Davenport]
• One of my favorite recurring features on the internets, The Sports Snob. Today’s topic: Manny Ramirez. [You Been Blinded]
• Peter King keeps writing stupid crap, Unsilent fills in for Drew and doesn’t miss a beat pointing it out. It’s the way of the universe, people. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• Learn some etiquette, or “Ottiquette” from hockey player Steve Ott. [Melt Your Face Off]
• The Onion Headline of the Day, Part II: Man Already Knows Everything He Needs To Know About Muslims
Send tips, links, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.
No really, they did.
In a move to protect their investment, Proctor & Gamble, the pharmaceuticals conglomerate which manufactures Head & Shoulders, has taken out a $1 million insurance policy through Lloyd’s of London on the Pittsburgh Steelers safety Troy Polamalu’s hair, who has been a celebrity endorser of the shampoo for awhile now. While it is not uncommon for teams and athletes to take out insurance policies to protect future contract monies in case of injury, this certainly has to be the first time a professional athlete’s hair has been insured.
Via Sports Biz with Darren Rovell:
“Until now, no other NFL player’s hair has been so ridiculously full and thick to warrant this first ever type of insurance policy,” the company said in a statement.
Here’s how the deal works. If Polamalu loses 66 percent or more of his hair during the next seven months, we presume without getting a haircut, he will collect the $1 million.
A trichologist, who studies the hair and the scalp, has examined Polamalu’s hair prior to the insurance policy and assured Lloyd’s that it is currently 100 percent healthy.
Interesting, but one question: how does one go about becoming a trichologist? By flunking out of Dermatology School?
And it’s real encouraging to learn that Troy Polamalu’s freaking hair is worth more than my life. Yet another knock to ol’ Weed’s already fragile self-esteem. Yay. At the same time, he does have nice hair, I suppose. Good for him.
Head & Shoulders Insures Polamalu’s Hair [Sports Biz with Darren Rovell]
Argentinian media reported earlier today that the legendary Francisco Vallaro, who was the last living player from the inaugural World Cup in 1930, is now flopping on the Great Pitch in the Sky after passing away in his hometown of La Plata, Argentina. Vallaro, who celebrated his 100th birthday on February 5th, played for the Argentina side who lost to Uruguay 4-2 in the final in Montevideo, was awarded with the FIFA Order of Merit in 1994 and retired from play all the way back in 1940 due to injury.
A little background on the centenarian soccer player (via Reuters):
In an interview marking his 100th birthday in February, the forward known for his bravery and accurate shooting said Argentina lost the 1930 final through “lack of guts” after leading 2-1 at halftime.
Varallo won the Argentine title with home town club Gimnasia-La Plata in 1929 during the amateur era before joining Boca Juniors, scoring 194 goals and helping them win three professional league titles between 1931 and 1936.
While the initial reports do not indicate what Vallaro died from, natural causes and old age are arguably the likely culprits. Also not reported: whether or not anyone attempted to revive the old footballer with whatever it is that they spray on players when they are injured. Seriously, what is that stuff?
Last survivor of first World Cup soccer final dies at 100 [Reuters]
Is it just me or are the walls melting?
I have never have had the pleasure to attend a live performance of any kind for a children’s program, be it The Wiggles or Yo Gabba Gabba!, so perhaps one of you Sportress readers can answer this question for me: is it common for these shows to feature as much psychedelic imagery as the standard Pink Floyd: The Wall laser light show? That is some freaky-deaky stuff going on there. Is it possible that these kind of performances are slowly transforming our nation’s youth into a bunch of spaced-out tweakers?
At the same time, as The700Level points out, at least the Phillie Phanatic might have found some kindred spirits in the Yo Gabba Gabba! crew who share similar interests as it does. You know, like unintentionally terrifying children and psychologically scarring them for life and whatnot.
[H/T The700Level]
The oddest part? Despite living half a world away with distinctly different customs and societal norms, Pakistanis have a similar response to whenever an alleged match-fixing scandal erupts in the great sport of cricket: animal abuse. The only difference is that instead of punching donkeys to articulate their frustration and anger, Pakistanis pelt them with rotten tomatoes and slap them with their shoes. Tomato, Tomahto, I guess.
Apparently, there has been some sinister stuff going on lately in the cricket world. Accusations of match-fixing have been thrown about alleging that members of the Pakistani cricket team have been taking bribes for altering the outcome of matches. Beyond that, I can provide no further details because I haven’t taken the time to read up on it. And even if I had, I probably wouldn’t have been able to explain it any better because cricket makes little sense so it is logical to assume that controversy surrounding the sport is bound to be a head-scratcher as well.
But here is what I can adequately explain in spite of my ignorance: Pakistani cricket fans took a bunch of donkeys, labeled them with the names of the supposed match-fixers than proceeded to parade them down the street while onlookers chucked rotten tomatoes at the innocent animals while beating them with their shoes. Makes sense.
One protester’s justification for abusing an innocent animal, via The Guardian:
“These players have let us and the country down. We are already facing so many problems because of the floods and terrorism, and they took away our one source of happiness,” one protestor said.
Indeed. Thankfully, video of the incident is scarce, but I imagine once some surfaces, it will the worst pounding an ass has taken on video since the filming of Anal Intruders 26: Up S**t Creek With A Paddle. Grisly stuff.
Pakistan cricket lovers make ass of players [AFP]
Protesters pelt donkeys bearing Pakistani players’ names with stones [The Guardian]
