Archive for December, 2009
• NHL. Minnesota Wild 1, Colorado Avalanche 0. Annti Miettinen’s goal early in the first period was all the Wild needed as Niklas Backstrom made 23 saves for his first shutout of the season. [NHL.com Scoreboard]
• NBA. Houston Rockets 95, Cleveland Cavaliers 85. Aaron Brooks scored 27 points and Trevor Ariza added 26 as the Rockets forced LeBron James into an 8-21 shooting night. [NBA.com Scoreboard]
• College Basketball. UW Green Bay Phoenix 88, (No. 20) Wisconsin Badgers 84 (OT). The Phoenix beat the Badgers for the first time in 16 tries as Wisconsin fell after getting into the Top 25 after beating Duke last week. [USA Today]
• Urine for some trouble if you steal urine from a testing facility. Authorities are on the lookout for a “person of interest” after 17 urine samples were swiped from a drug testing facility in Logan, Utah. I have a suggestion for the fuzz on how to find the perp – if you find a guy (or gal) who smells a little bit too much like asparagus, you probably have your thief. On the other hand, it might be an asparagus farmer with poor personal hygeine. [MSNBC/AP]
• NHL Hockey. Minnesota Wild at Colorado Avalanche. Hey! That’s the team I follow! The Minnesota Wild, that is. The Colorado Avalanche can go eat a dick as far as I’m concerned. Even if neither of these teams are your squad, it’s hockey in HD, so you should watch. [Versus, 9:00 ET]
• NBA Basketball. Chicago Bulls at Atlanta Hawks. Taking into account that the Bulls lost to the New Jersey Nets last night – the Nets! – it wouldn’t be surprising to see them come out with a spirited effort tonight. Or completely roll into a ball on the floor and cry like babies. [ESPN, 7:00 ET]
• College Basketball Doubleheader. Georgia at St. John’s is first, followed up by Villanova at St. Joseph’s. St. Mark’s and St. Paul’s and St. Peter’s feel incredibly left out. [ESPN2, 7:00 ET]
• Basic Cable Movie of the Night. A Christmas Story. If you were smart, you would watch this tonight. There’s no telling when it will be on again. And that last comment was complete sarcasm, by the way. [TNT, 10:00 ET]
It’s 4:19, You Gotta Minute? (December 9th)
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• Hockey-playing chicks be fighting. [Melt Your Face Off]
• Randy Moller, the Carolina Panthers play-by-play man, is awesome. [Awful Announcing]
• You, yes you, can now create your own lame customized MMA shirt. [With Leather]
• Holy ugly Kobe Bryant Nike shoes, Batman! [FirstCuts]
• Some Sioux in North Dakota are not offended by the name “Fighting Sioux.” [The Sporting Blog]
• You know what they say: Norwegian goalies can make some pretty nice saves sometimes. I’m pretty sure that’s what they say. [Puck Daddy]
I don’t know much about the mysterious country of Canadia – few people do, with the country all tucked up behind the Canuckistanian Mountains in the Canarctic Circle up there – but I can tell you this: they love their curling.
For the uninitiated, the Canuckistanians are currently holding their Olympic Trials at Rexall Place in Edmonton. It is quite the big deal and the Great People of the North affectionately – and cleverly – refer to the grand event as Roar of the Rings. ROAR!
Here’s a little taste of what you’re missing:
Cheryl Bernard came from a deficit to take control of her match against Shannon Kleibrink, winning 8-5. Kleibrink scored a clutch shot to tie the score in the ninth, threading between defenders to finish on the button. Bernard used the hammer in the tenth to score three points.
That’s right, kiddos. The cold-hearted curler busted out the hammer! WHAM! Whatever that means.
Further, what makes this event so interesting is the choice of sponsor: Tim Hortons. In case you are a xenophobic nutjob with no idea what is going on in other places in the world, Tim Hortons is one of things that makes Canadians most proud. You see, it is a chain eatery best known for its donuts and coffee, among other tasty, delectable treats. Think of it as a Dunkin’ Donuts, only more Canadian-ey-ey.
And so there you have it, folks: a quick tour of Canuckistanian culture. Consider it a public service from yours truly. Because, you know, I care and stuff.
Bernard keeps control at Roar of the Rings [CTV Olympics]
Big news today out of Buffalo for fans of malcontent wide receivers with dwindling skills: Terrell Owens, in an interview with Fox Sports, has stated he intends on playing football for years to come, or maybe three. Via The Huddle:
“Realistically I could see at least two to three. I want to be able to walk away from this game under my own power and when I feel it’s time to walk away, not trying to prolong or there aren’t any milestones I want to accomplish. I just want to try to compete and help the team win a championship. So if I can do that for the next couple of years then I’ll be satisfied.”
Good for him. As long as there is a team out there willing to pay T.O., there should be no reason why he shouldn’t continue to play. But Owens just turned 36 on Monday, which makes him pretty long in the tooth as far as being young enough to be a dominant receiver in the NFL is concerned. Granted, Owens appears to have been on his best behavior in Buffalo this season, but his numbers are not what they used to be. Heading into this weekend’s game against the Kansas City Chiefs, Owens has only 43 receptions for 690 yards and a paltry 3 touchdowns, which puts him on pace to have his worst season statistically since his rookie year in 1996 when he played in San Francisco.
To put those numbers in perspective, in 2005 while playing for the Eagles – the season he was suspended for four games and then ultimately deactivated for the remainder of the season due to his disruptive behavior - in only seven games, Owens had 47 catches for 763 yards and 6 touchdowns.
So, I’m not saying his career is over, but his best years are clearly behind him. Sure, it probably doesn’t help that he has been catching balls from from Trent Edwards and Ryan Fitzpatrick this season, but what are ya gonna do, right?
Terrell Owens says he’d like to play ‘two to three’ more years [The Huddle]
The Second Coming has arrived, and we shall rejoice in the grandeur of this blessed event.
That’s right, folks. Tom Brady announced today that his blushing bride Gisele Bundchen squeezed out a bouncing baby boy on Tuesday.
“Everyone’s great,” Brady said. “I didn’t get much sleep.”
Well, of course he didn’t get much sleep. While Gisele was toiling away in labor, Tom was probably busy plowing prospective candidates for the nanny position. If Tom has learned anything from the great and talented professional athletes who have come before him, it’s that you better kick those nanny’s tires and test the tread, so to speak.
Which leads me to my next thought – do you think Gisele’s OB/GYN gave her the much-ballyhooed “husband stitch”? Some say it’s an urban legend, others say it is as real (and as necessary) as prenuptial agreements. I don’t know which side of the argument I fall on, although if the technology is there, why aren’t they using it? Throw new daddies a bone, dammmit.
Supermodel Bundchen and QB Tom Brady have baby boy [Yahoo!/AP]
‘We’re Talking About Meetings, Man’
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Four players on the New England Patriots, including Randy Moss, were sent home from meetings earlier today by head coach Bill Belichick due to being late for an 8:00 a.m. meeting. Via tWWL:
In addition to Moss, the other players were defensive end Derrick Burgess and linebackers Adalius Thomas and Gary Guyton, according to the report. The players were apparently delayed by weather conditions, and will reportedly not be able to participate in team events Wednesday. All four were absent from Wednesday afternoon’s practice.
As to be expected, Belichick refused to confirm that the players were in fact sent home.
“Anything that happens with discipline on the team will stay between me and the players,” Belichick said Wednesday morning.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems to me that we never used to hear about stuff like this coming out in the past regarding the Patriots, if in fact it ever happened at all. I’m certainly not the first person to speculate on this, but it certainly appears that we are beginning to see the first signs of cracks in the structural integrity of the Belichick Empire.
4th and 2, baby.
Oh, and the photo of Belichick’s wife and her magnificent breasts? No, it really has nothing to do with the story. That’s just a gift from me to you. Merry Christmas or whatever.
Belichick: Discipline matters internal [ESPN]
Unless those friends are “Facebook friends” – then apparently all bets are off.
This video has been everywhere, but who am I not to drink from the teat of pageview goodness? Apparently, some guy bet his friends – ahem – Facebook friends – that if the Saints beat his beloved Redskins, he would let them shoot up his 60-inch flatscreen television.
And wouldn’t you know it? The Saints won in dramatic fashion, 33-30 in overtime.
And wouldn’t you know it? Those so-called friends made him honor the bet. And boy, did they have a rip-roarin’, hoot of a time doing it. But my word, the arsenal of weapons these guys brought along. These motherfuckers aren’t messing around – they are armed to the friggin’ teeth. Can we be certain that these low-bred hicks aren’t the brains behind some backwoods anti-government militia of some sort? Maybe not the brains, as clearly evidenced by the fact that they shoot the shit out of a person’s television, but you catch my drift.
[H/T With Leather]
• Take the quiz, but you might not be happy with the results. [Guyism]
• In other Tiger news, are you jackin’ it? You will be soon – the Tiger Woods porno is almost finished. [Out of Bounds]
• Orlando Magic head coach Stan Van Gundy will participate in the 3-Point Shot Contest at the All-Star Game. Say what? [Ball Don't Lie]
• Week 13′s NFLLOL is hilarious, as usual. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• The American Mustache Institute is pissed off at Fox’s Chris Rose, but really, who isn’t? [Joe Sports Fan]
• A quality recap of Day 2 of the MLB Winter Meetings. [More Hardball]
• Good stuff: the Charlie Weis Relief Fund Video. Give until it hurts, people. [Tauntr]
Hey, I wouldn’t have done it if I wasn’t required to do so in accordance with the Articles and Bylaws of Sports Bloggery. My hands were tied here, which is also how I envision the condition Gary Coleman’s hands shortly after this photo was snapped.
BAM! How do you like them apples? Which is what I imagine Mark Messier said while teabagging Gary Coleman shortly after this photo was taken.
HEY-OH! Actually, this whole act is just plain wrong – which is what I imagine Mark Messier said after teabagging Gary Coleman shortly after the above photo was taken.
What’s that? Oh yeah, the Mark Messier news. Yeah, apparently he’s been named the general manager for the 2010 IIHF World Hockey Championship by Hockey Canada, which is scheduled to take place May 7th through the 23rd in Germany. So, that’s pretty cool for Messier – I am sure he is very proud, which I reckon is the exact opposite of the way he felt shortly after the above photo was taken.
HOCKEY CANADA NAMES MESSIER GM OF 2010 WORLDS [TSN]
Jeffrey Lurie, the owner of the Philadelphia Eagles, clearly believes that Andy Reid is a better coach than a father (cheap shot), as he announced Wednesday that he has given the winningest coach in team history a three-year contract extension. Terms were not disclosed but details will likely emerge at a news conference that is scheduled this morning for 11:30 EST.
The Eagles are having a decent season this year, sitting at 8-4 and tied for first in the NFC East, so an extension makes a certain level of sense. And despite the fact that Reid is frequently criticized by fans, it’s hard to argue with the team’s consistency and level of success under Reid’s watch. In 10 seasons, Reid has made it to the playoffs nine times, including five trips to the NFC Championship Game, although he has only led the Eagles to the Super Bowl once.
Reid’s family life and how his dedication to coaching might have led to his sons, Garret and Britt, developing drug problems which ultimately got them in some pretty serious trouble with the law has also been scrutinized. His sons’ drug problems ultimately led to Reid taking a leave of absence during the 2007 season. Britt completed a drug treatment program in June and appears to be getting his life back on track while Garrett was sentenced to two years for attempting to smuggle prescription pills into jail. He was serving his sentence at a halfway house but then failed a drug test in May of this year, so now is serving that time in prison.
I guess Reid’s personal experiences prove the old adage: “Lucky in coaching, unlucky in having druggy, felonious kids.”
Or something like that.
Eagles, Reid agree to 3-year contract extension [Yahoo!/AP]
Andy Reid’s Rugrats Are Terror Behind The Wheel [Deadspin]
Britt Reid graduates from Pa. drug court program [Sporting News/AP]
Garrett Reid in Trouble Again [NBC Philaelphia]
Well outside the realm of ringing endorsements, what Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa said regarding his belief on what kind of job Mark McGwire will do as hitting coach for his ballclub probably didn’t make McGwire feel all warm and fuzzy.
“I think it’s going to work,” La Russa asserted Tuesday at the baseball winter meetings.
He thinks it’s going to work? Boy, LaRussa appeared not willing to stick his neck out too far for his new hire. If LaRussa would have went with something like, “Why wouldn’t it work?” or “I have no doubts that this will work” I might feel a bit differently, but merely thinking something is going to work doesn’t necessarily make me feel that LaRussa is very confident about his choice.
LaRussa’s comments sound exactly like something I would say when I’m way over my head while fixing something at home and my wife walks up to me with a quizzical look on her face and says, “Are you sure you know what you’re doing there?” and I reply, while wrapping another piece of duct tape around a leaky pipe, “I think it’s going to work.” Pretty much exactly like that.
It certainly doesn’t help that McGwire, up to this point, has refused to address the elephant in the room: his controversial testimony to Congress in 2005 regarding alleged steroid use when he refused to answer questions, claiming he wasn’t there to talk about the past. But LaRussa believes that McGwire will at one point address those pesky steroid issues – prior to spring training – and then things will be just fine. Probably. Maybe.
“He’ll say whatever he has to say,” La Russa said. “Once we get to camp, it’ll be about coaching.”
Indeed it will, Tony. Good luck with all that.
La Russa on McGwire: ‘I think it’s going to work’ [Yahoo!/AP]
• NHL. Nashville Predators 4, Vancouver Canucks 2. Martin Erat had his second career hat trick to lead the Predators. [NHL.com Scoreboard]
• NBA. New Jersey Nets 103, Chicago Bulls 101. Devin Harris scored with 14.9 seconds remaining to give the Nets their second victory of the season. [NBA.com Scoreboard]
• NFL. The Washington Redskins put running back Clinton Portis on injured reserve as he continues his recovery from a concussion. [The Washington Post]
• “You put your weed in there.” A well-meaning but absent-minded person in Ohio donated an antique metal water jug to charity that contained over a pound of marijauana. Man, I have nothing to add here other than, man….dude, oh man, that’s just….man…harsh, dude. [MSNBC/AP]
Last Call: i-Booze Edition
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Sad news to report out of the Seattle area. i-Booze, a company which provided the wonderful service of taking online orders for delivery of sweet, sweet alcohol, have recently seen there ability to sell booze severely handicapped by government bureaucrats due to one little, measly technicality:
They never secured a liquor license. D’oh!
For Techflash has delivered the information that not only has i-Booze failed to secure a license to sell liquor but that its enterprising founder, Karim Varela, uncorked a plea bargain on two misdemeanor charges of selling alcohol without a license and illegal possession of alcohol with intent to sell.
Yeah, that’s not good. So there you have it: a wonderful idea squelched due to negligence and flat-out stupidity. i-Booze has since changed its name to Dilky and if you go to their website, you will see that they are working diligently on getting that liquor license. Not too diligently, though, as the last update was posted on August 22nd. D’oh, indeed.
• NHL Hockey. New York Islanders at Philadelphia Flyers. An Eastern Conference matchup? On Versus? Get outta here! [Versus, 7:00 ET]
• College Basketball. Jimmy V Classic. First up, Butler vs. Georgetown. Next, Indiana vs. Pittsburgh. Never give up, or something. [ESPN, 7:00 ET]
• Very funny. The Office. Four episodes. Could be worse. [TBS, 8:00 ET]
• Basic Cable Movie of the Night. I, Robot. Me, Not Watching. [FX, 8:00 ET]
