Aug
06
3:15 pm

SI’s Cheerleader Of The Week Kate Kind Of Scares Me

By Weed Against Speed · · Posted at 3:15 pm on Aug. 06, 2009

yp_kate-texas_30299

Most people are already aware of this, but Sports Illustrated has a recurring feature called “Cheerleader of the Week” which runs, er, every week. Makes sense. Once selected, the cheerleader of the week has a photo gallery posted on SI.com. They are also asked 20 random questions so that the readers/future potential stalkers can get to know them a little better.

Anyway, this week’s featured cheerleader is Kate Glover, a senior at the University of Texas majoring in Corporate Communications. By all accounts, she seems like a perfectly nice enough gal: cute, perky, reasonably intelligent and boasts a very nice figure. But when I checked out her photo gallery, there was something about her that struck me as a little off…

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Ahhh!!! Is it just me, or does Kate seem, I don’t know, kind of evil? Like the sort of girl that after going on one date with a guy she would get all stalker-like and break into his house just so she could harvest some of his body hair out of the shower drain? You know, to become closer with him? Don’t get me wrong, the girl is an absolute doll, but there’s something about her I can’t quite put my finger on…

yp_kate-texas_8421Above is her, “I’m sorry I had to slash the tires on your car, but I didn’t want you to be able to leave me” look.

yp_kate-texas_8431Here’s another one of her looks: the always unsettling “I will figure out a way to make you love me even if it kills you.”

yp_kate-texas_8458“I’m pregnant, you’re the father and I’m going to kill all three of us!” (RIP, George Carlin)

But perhaps most unsettling about the comely Kate are the following two answers she gave during her 20 questions:

Three things I’d take to a desert island are: My Bible, a photo album of my loved ones and some sunscreen. I hate being sunburned!

Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa…whoa. Fuck the heck?

If I had to watch one movie on loop for ever, it would be: How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. I think that Kate Hudson is one of the cutest actresses and is so funny!

Gahhhhh! How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days??? Run! Run like the wind!!

(Note: and yes, before anyone from the University of Texas sends me an angry e-mail, I know, a lowly loser blogger like me wouldn’t have a chance in hell to go out with such an attractive, intelligent girl, so spare me)

Cheerleader of the Week: University of Texas’ Kate [SI.com]

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8 Comments

1
mcbias

HA! I’m sure she’s normal enough, but yes, those eyes certainly do look intense. Funny post, WAS.

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2
Shakey

SHE FEEDS ON THE TEARS OF SMALL MAMMALS!

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3
CRM

Come on you losery blogger. You’d never have a shot with a beautiful, smart, obviously crazy girl like that.

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4
HabsFan29

Well I was going to write that psychopathic homicidal cheerleaders turn me on, but then I got to that Bible part. That’s the real turnoff.

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5
Tampa Bo

Shes Nutz. But I would hit though. Then Run.

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6
gally82

Ah Weed, I’m sure you’d have a chance. She looks all needy and what not.

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7
KobeWearsAPurpleThong

I don’t see the big deal my man. She’s from Texas, which has one of the largest Christian popultaions in the USA, so I’m not shocked see said Bible…

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8
Orion

I think it’s simply a likeness 2 Linda Blair – the gal that was featured in the 1973 movie ‘The Exorcist’… ?!!

[Reply]

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