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Olympics

Weird: Five Jamaican Athletes Test Positive For What Authorities Are Calling The Same “Minor Drug”

bag_jamaicaFive Jamaican athletes tested positive for a banned substance at last month’s national championships in Kingston and I assume will be ineligible to compete in next month’s world athletics championships in Berlin.

“I can confirm that five athletes tested positive for a minor substance but a further announcement will be made,” an official said on condition of anonymity.

None of the athletes who tested positive were medalists at the Olympic Games in BeijingĀ  but the official added that the results were “frightening” because “all five tested positive for the same drug, although the five trained almost under different circumstances.” According to the same anonymous official:

“I can tell you that none of the world stars are involved. The drug itself is not an anabolic steroid and is considered a minor drug, meaning that with a good explanation at a hearing, the athlete could get off with a reprimand.”

Well, if it wasn’t an anabolic steroid and the Jamaican official claims it is considered a “minor drug,” I wonder what it could have possibly been. If only Jamaica was known for the production and recreational use of some minor drug, we might be able to roll this one up and tie it into a neat little bow…

I mean wrap this one up, not roll it up. Jeez, I don’t know where my mind has been lately. To put it bluntly, I don’t think there’s any way we’re going to get to the bottom of this one because I’m spliffed.

Shit. I mean stumped. Stumped was the word I was looking for. Isn’t it weird how words sometimes get all mixed up in your head, man. Far out.

Five Jamaican athletes test positive [Reuters]