I Wonder If He Would Have Been As Successful Had He Kept His Real Name, Tim Lincejizz

Ha! Get it? His last name is Lincecum and I suggested that his real name is Lincejizz! I substituted cum for jizz. You won’t find writing like that on any mainstream site. No siree, bud. In these parts, you better be ready for anything because I am constantly bringing the funny.

Anyhoo, potential future Iggy Pop impersonator Tim Lincecum has been announced as the National League’s starting pitcher for tomorrow night’s All-Star Game. Roy Halladay gets the nod for the American League.

Roy Halladay? More like Roy Hallagay, amirite?

Jesus, I need a drink.

Tim Lincecum, Roy Halladay to start All-Star game [The Associated Press]