Archive for May, 2009
Cal and Kelly Ripken try to attend the Kentucky Derby every year with friends and this year was no different. What was different, however, was there was something about one horse inparticular that prompted the Ripkens to place a wager on a 50-1 long shot. Of course, of course, the horse was a horse, of course, of course, the name of the horse, of course is the now-famous Mine That Bird.
But why that horse?
The horse is called Mine That Bird, which appealed to the man who played for the Orioles all those years, and it was going to be ridden by Calvin Borel, who shares a first name with the Orioles Hall of Famer. The fact that the horse was coming out of the No. 8 slot clinched it. How could Cal and Kelly and all their friends not bet on Mine That Bird?
No word on how much was wagered or how much the Ripkens won but it probably was a pretty penny given the 50-1 odds.
Obviously, the Ripkens placing a wager on Mine That Bird made perfect sense considering the above excerpt, but I’m still left wondering what the Ripkens would have done if a horse named “Kevin Costner Banged My Wife” was in the race. There would have definitely been some awkward moments, to say the least.
You know, I should start a business where people pay me to name their horses. I’m creative and I bet there is some good money to be made in that field. Plus all the oats you can eat. Cool.
Birds of a feather: Ripken took shot on Derby winner [Baltimore Sun]
Mike Burden, the associate head coach for the University of Maine’s men’s basketball team has tendered his resignation in connection with being charged with unlawful sexual contact against a 21-year old and assault against a second woman who attempted to assist the victim. Reports indicate that the 21-year old woman was a student athlete that played soccer at the university.
The victim was allegedly looking for a lost cell phone when the incident occurred.
Note: I was going to try some sort of Maine lobster/claws zinger but I don’t have it in me.
UMaine coach resigns amid charges [WBZ-TV]
• The Ku Klux Klan topped the Hebrew All-Stars 4-0 in a baseball game in 1926 and there’s a box score to prove it. [Big League Stew]
• Amazon.com book reviewers of Selena Roberts’ A-Rod book seem to have trouble forgetting about her columns regarding the Duke lacrosse alleged rape fiasco. [Deadspin]
• Mike Singletary’s wife loves him and all, but there were times in the past where she “wishes he was white.” Clive Clemmons thinks that’s “INAPPROPRIATE!!” [SPORTSbyBROOKS]
• KILL IT!! KILLLLL IT!! One question: with Roger Patterson long since passed away, who in the hell took the photo? [H/T D.C. Sports Bog]
In exchange for the city allowing the Yankees to sell seats, signs and other assorted items from the original Yankee Stadium, the team will pay New York City $11.5 million.
Sweet deal, right? Mayor Michael Bloomberg agrees:
“The city’s agreement with the Yankees will generate much-needed revenue for the city, and offer fans a chance to own some of the famed Yankee Stadium history.”
Not so fast, Mr. Mayor – Assemblyman Richard Brodsky, who has been a frequent and vocal critic of the Yankees throughout the entire process of building the new stadium, doesn’t like it – no sir, he doesn’t like it one bit.
I’m sorry, I think I’m getting Roger Clemens mixed up with someone else. Honest mistake.
Anyhoo, Clemens was on “Mike & Mike in the Morning” on ESPN radio today, and as expected, he denied taking steroids, used the word “misremembers” again and claims it would have been “suicidal” for him to take steroids, given his family’s history of heart trouble.
Blah, blah, blah. But what did you expect? This was Mike & Mike interviewing Clemens – not Ed Bradley – the primary reason being that Bradley has been dead for years, and the last time he was interviewed by someone from 60 Minutes, it didn’t result in the sort of goodwill he anticipated.
Mike and Mike even had a little fun with Clemens, inquiring as to whether he is now retired for good:
“I’ve [retired] three times. Do I need to announce it again? It’s a competition between myself and Brett Favre. If he comes back again, then I’m going to get out and start hitting the pavement.”
Huh. He must incorrectly believe that pavement is Brian McNamee or something. Maybe Mindy McReady, but it’s obviously a case of mistaken identity.
Clemens breaks silence, again denies drug use [The Associated Press]
Roger Clemens denies steroid claims in new book [Newsday]
Clemens Vehemently Denies Steroid Use [CBS News]
See, Brett Favre? This is how you go about doing it.
After spending a month contemplating retirement, Mike Modano has decided he will lace up the skates for one more season with the Dallas Stars.
Modano, the all-time points leader by a U.S. born player (1,183), has spent his entire career with the Stars organization, including his first four seasons in the NHL when they were the Minnesota North Stars – ugh – and in 1,179 games played, he has 485 goals and 698 assists.
You know, I can see why he has put-off retiring. As we have learned all too well lately, it is incredibly hard for an athlete to walk away from the sport they have dedicated their lives to, especially when they still believe they have something left in the tank.
Plus, the lure of the rink must be pretty strong when you consider that if he retired, imagine that he would have to spend every waking moment with his battle axe of a wife:
Fox Sports Headline Fail
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! It’s funny because his name is Kane which sounds like Cain and Able and Abel sound the same too and Cain and Abel were brothers from the Genesis story in the Bible! Homophones rule!
Seriously, they better stop because I can handle Noah more of this without peeing my pants from laughter.
Whoo…okay, I’m feeling much better. Don’t worry about me. It’s Saul good now.
• NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs. The Washington Capitals forced a Game 7 in their series against the Pittsburgh Penguins, winning in overtime 5-4 when Dave Steckel deflected Brooks Laich’s shot past Marc-Andre Fleury. Ovechkin contributed three assists and it was Washington’s first win in overtime in their last eight tries. Patrick Kane notched his first career hat trick and it couldn’t have come at a better time, as Chicago rallied from one goal defecits twice and scored four goals in the third period, beating Vancouver 7-5 and advancing to the Western Conference Finals. [NHL.com Scoreboard]
• NBA Playoffs. LeBron James scored 27 points as the Cavaliers completed their second consecutive sweep of the playoffs by beating the Hawks 84-74. Cleveland extended their NBA-record of double digit playoff victories to eight in a row. The Mavericks stayed alive in their series with the Nuggets, led by Dirk Nowitzki’s 44 points, as Dallas beat Denver 119-117. The Nuggets are still in control of the series, holding a 3-1 lead. [NBA.com Scoreboard]
• MLB Scoreboard. Only four games on the schedule last night. Washington’s Ryan Zimmerman extended his hitting streak to 29 games but the Nationals still fell to the Giants 11-7; the Indians beat the White Sox 9-4; the bullpen blew it for Johan Santana as the Mets lost to the Braves 8-3; and Cincinatti pounded Arizona 13-5. [MLB.com Scoreboard]
• Sure, the shot glasses caused quite a stir, but no one said a word about the condoms and morning-after pills emblazoned with the school logo. A Pennsylvania high sc hool gave out shot glasses to students in attendance as prom favors and the assistant principal now says it may have sent the wrong message. No shit, Sherlock. Beer bongs would have been much more appropriate. [MSNBC]
(AP Photo/Charles Dharapak)
Despite our many political differences, affiliations and philosophies, one thing I think all of us can agree upon is that President Barack Obama is a huge sports fan and he will always make time for championship sports teams. Case in point: Obama welcomed the North Carolina Tar Heels Men’s Basketball team to the Southern Lawn of the White House today so he could congratulate the team on their national championship, a trend that doesn’t appear likely to die down any time soon.
“Welcome to the White House and congratulations,” Obama said after emerging from the White House at 2:11 p.m. It took only two minutes to get to his real message:
“More importantly,” he said, “thanks for salvaging my bracket and vindicating me in the eyes of everyone.”
Oh sure, North Carolina – you can save the President’s bracket but you couldn’t lose to Oklahoma in the regional finals to save my ass, huh? What gives?
• NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs. Game 6, Washington Capitals at Pittsburgh Penguins (7:00 ET). Sidney Crosby and the boys can put away Ovie and the Capitals tonight. I can’t imagine the NHL will let that happen; Game 6, Vancouver Canucks at Chicago Blackhawks (9:30 ET). Chicago can put Vancouver away in front of their home fans. I’m pretty sure the NHL can go either way on this one. [Versus]
• NBA Playoffs. Game 4, Cleveland Cavaliers at Atlanta Hawks (7:00 ET). No matter the outcome tonight, this series is effectively over. Game 4, Denver Nuggets at Dallas Mavericks (9:30 ET). Watch to see if Mark Cuban will pick a fight with a handicapped Nuggets fan. [TNT]
• Major League Baseball. Atlanta Braves at New York Mets. Sweet! A game with a team from New York is on ESPN! [ESPN, 7:00 ET]
• One of the most entertaining shows on television. Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations. You don’t have to be a foodie to enjoy this show. Bourdain rules, simple as that. Tonight’s episode: Tokyo. [Travel Channel, 10:00 ET]
• I’m twitching with anticipation just thinking about watching this. The E! True Hollywood Story: Michael J. Fox. Yeah, I said it. [Style Network, 9:00 ET]
It’s 4:19, You Gotta Minute? (May 11th)
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• It’s time to mercilessly mock another one of Peter King’s atrocious columns, courtesy of Big Daddy Drew. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]
• Video of Bo Jackson giving the commencement address at Auburn. It’s good, but not as entertaining as the Tecmo Bowl videos you can find of Jackson on You Tube. [Fanhouse]
• ESPN doesn’t intend on having Selena Roberts on the network to ask her questions about her A-Rod book. Makes sense – no one is really talking about it anyway. [Caught on the Fly]
• Get this: the father of the kid who was knocked down by Glen Davis during the celebration of his game-winning jumper wants an apology. Dickbag. [Ball Don't Lie]
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Alessandro Trovati/Associated Press
American cyclist Christian Vande Velde has withdrawn from the Giro d’Italia race after a crash during the third stage that left him with two broken ribs and a sprained back.
Vande Velde is the leader of the cycling team Garmin Slipstream and wiped out when “Vande Velde’s front wheel had touched the wheel of a rider ahead of him.”
That’s why I only ride unicycles. Nothing bad like this can happen since the wheel is directly underneath you, for cryin’ out loud.
Be that as it may, talk about your bad luck, which must run in the family. You do recall what happened to Jean Van de Velde, right?
Read More→
Vikings team president and co-owner Mark Wilf engaged in the same sort of doublespeak earlier today at a luncheon on the campus of Southwest Minnesota State that we all should have become accustomed to by now during the Brett Favre Comeback Tour, Part II: Electric Boogaloo.
From Access Vikings:
“The reality is we understand everyone’s curiosity about it,” Wilf said. “This is something that every day we are working on making our team better and we are going to evaluate every player that comes through the door and that would include Brett Favre as well. … That process continues every day and a player like Brett would be included in that evaluation. Just like any other player. He’s a Hall of Fame quarterback and great competitor and ultimately you have to ask Brett Favre what his plans are. Sure there is interest in Brett Favre but that’s part of the process in general.”
Well, that’s certainly informative. Thanks, Mark Wilf.
Vikings linebackers Ben Leber and Chad Greenway also attended the luncheon. Is there any chance we might get some insight into what’s going on from either of these two?
• According to the charges filed, a middle school boy was sexually assaulted by four of his teammates with a broom and a hockey stick. What in the hell is this world coming to? [Sports Rubbish]
• These guys want you to vote Lastings Milledge into the All-Star Game. Sure, he’s been demoted to Triple-A and in seven games with the Nationals he batted .167, but he’s on the ballot. [Bootlegger Sports]
• Create your own Tiger Woods press conference. Everybody’s doing it. [Devil Ball Golf]
• Photo evidence of the world’s coolest sports fanatic. It should come as no surprise he’s a Boston fan, right? [Bugs & Cranks]
• BaBa Booey of Howard Stern fame threw out the first pitch at Saturday’s Pirates-Mets game. Awkward. [H/T Awful Announcing]
Frenchman Richard Gasquet is looking down the snoot tube at a 2-year ban for testing positive for cocaine in a drug test administered at the Miami Masters in March.
Gasquet, however, proclaims he’s not guilty.
“I want to prove my innocence and will explain myself at an appropriate time…the test of the B sample submitted at the end of March 2009, confirmed the positive result of the A sample taken on the same day. Given the complexity of the case, I am gathering the evidence of my innocence and will later set a date to make further comments.”
The suspension couldn’t have come at a worse time for Gasquet, who is currently seventh in the world rankings.
Nevertheless, according to ITF spokesman Neil Robinson, the suspension will be upheld until a hearing before an anti-doping tribunal takes place, which should be some time within the next 60 days.
I guess from this point forward I will refer to Gasquet’s serve as the “Feelgood Hit of the Summer.”
Either way, it sucks to be Richard Gasquet right now, but things can and will get better, I’m sure. I wouldn’t be surprised if we found out more professional tennis players dabbled in blow from time to time. Except Andre Agassi, of course – once he hooked up with Steffi Graf, any chance of maintaining a coke habit went out the window. Seriously, can you imagine if he had to share his stash with someone with a schnozz like this? It would be like going in on an 8 ball with Karl Malden*.
* gratuitous Family Guy reference
Gasquet suspended after drug test [BBC]
